When I was younger, I used to think that when you got older, mean people suddenly went away. I thought that people taking time out of their days to say something negative about someone else suddenly vanished. As I grew up, I realized that was not the case.
I remember sitting in my room at 13 and thinking that maybe tomorrow at school I could sit at my desk without the group of "cool" boys dissecting everything from the clothing brands I wore to what I had for lunch that day. When I got to high school, there was much less to be said about me. I joined the swim team, found a new set of friends and never felt or heard that there were people talking about me behind my back. I did notice that, although people had stopped talking about me, they had moved on to someone else.
If you haven't learned this lesson yet, I urge you to: It is never your responsibility to make another person like you if they don't want to.
That sudden realization made my life much easier. I realized that it has nothing to do with your age, where you're from or where you're going; people will say things that are false, will make you feel small and make you feel like you do not deserve what you have or want.
It took some time for me to understand, but the more I subjected myself to knowing what others were saying, the more upset I was. It's important to be aware of the general perception of you, but it's dangerous to live your life in a way that you feel like your behaviors have to control that perception. People are going to say whatever they want about you and that's just how it is.
For those of you who don't know what Yik Yak is, it's a smartphone app that allows users to anonymously create and comment on threads. The app is popular on college campuses; students can post about the cute girl in the dining hall or the boy wearing the red shirt in the gym. It's creepy. I choose to not have the app; if I can avoid seeing negative things about me, then I'm going to take the opportunity. Yik Yak is like passing around a notebook to everyone on your college campus and telling them to either write something good or bad about you. At the end of the day, you get the book back and have two options: read it or throw it away. I'd throw that book away.
Just when you think negativity is gone, it creeps its way back. You can be a respected, well-liked, and popular individual, but that doesn't stop people from targeting you. Don't let what others might think or say about you control the way you go about your day. There will always be someone who does not like what you do regardless of if it even affects them or not.
I continue to live my life in spite of what people think. My hope for you is that you do that as well.
From the "stuck up" boy who "might be gay" but is also "hooking up with that really cute sophomore girl" ... I know everything and I haven't stopped laughing about it.
