I'm The Girl Who Will ALWAYS Put 'Sisters Before Misters'

I'm The Girl Who Will ALWAYS Put 'Sisters Before Misters'

In the future, I know that when I start dating I won't forget that my best girl friends come first.

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As Valentine's Day comes up next month, and I am sitting on a couch watching a Buzzfeed Unsolved marathon of season one of "True Crime" and "Supernatural," I think back to the past year and my history with my love life. The more I think about it, the more I am fine with it.

Nothing major has happened. I still haven't had my first kiss, or my first significant other, still a virgin, and all is fine.

This can be seen as a follow up to my article where I talked about how I am 19, never had a significant other, and I am still having the time of my life. Now, as I am in a new decade of my life (yes, I'm talking about my twenties), nothing much has changed.

But now I am in a point where I am sticking with a phrase. That phrase is the well-known "sisters before misters."

A feminine play on the phrase "bros before hoes," where male friends say that their friends come first and any significant other, specifically female, comes second, "sisters before misters" means that female friends come first before any significant others, specifically of the male species. A majority of my friends are girls and while I do also have friends that are guys (hi, Sean and Josh), I know that I will never think of dating them in the future as they are like brothers to me.

But I know that when I get into my first relationship, I will definitely make time for my friends.

A while ago, I was (maybe still am) texting a guy that is close friends with one of my other close friends. My friend and I have established that if I were to get into a relationship with this guy, she knows that she can trust him with me (but if he hurts me, then he is dead). But another thing that we had established was that I was hers first and then his second, no matter how many times he said I was his, and even I said that she came first hands down.

Yes, I know that I have been single for 20 years of my life. Yes, I also dabbled a bit in dating apps like Tinder and sometimes Bumble. I only went back to Tinder after a year of not having, but after the small dabble I did in 2018 I decided to stop doing Tinder. But I still have it just in case (or if I am just a bored college student and I have nothing to do in my life which I definitely do have the stuff to do in my life).

But as time goes on for me, and I continue to get older and go through the rest of my college career, I do not know when I will find my quote-unquote "one." It could be during college, or it could be after college and I meet my one and only at my place of work (where my parents met), but I would just know that I will make sure to place my lady friends that have been there for a good point of my life first.

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An Open Letter To My Unexpected Best Friend

You came out of nowhere and changed my life for the better.
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“It's so amazing when someone comes to your life and you expect nothing out of it, but suddenly, there right in front of you is everything you ever need."

-Unknown

Dear Unexpected Best Friend,

You were the person I never thought I would speak to and now you are my very best friend. You came out of nowhere and changed my life for the better. I can't thank you enough for everything you have done to shape me into the person I am today. You've taught me what it means to be selfless, caring, patient, and, more importantly, adventurous.

You don't realize how much better my life has become and all because you came out of nowhere. I didn't see you coming. I just saw you on occasion, and now I can't see my life without you in it. It's funny how life works itself out like that. Our unexpected friendship filled a hole in my life that I didn't know existed.

I don't even remember what life was like before you came along; it most likely had a lot less laughter and spontaneity than it does today. I can call you about anything and you would drop whatever you're doing to help me in any situation. You know when I need encouragement. You know when I am at my best and when I am at my worst. You always know exactly what to say.

SEE ALSO: 8 Tiny Lies Every Young Woman Has Told Their Best Friend

I couldn't have found a better friend than you if I tried. We balance each other out in the best way possible. You are most definitely the yin to my yang, and I don't care how cliché that sounds. Because of you, I've learned to stop caring what people think and to do my own thing regardless of any backlash I might receive. You are my very favorite part of what makes me who I am to this day.

It's as if I wished up a best friend, and poof — you appeared right in front of me. I am so beyond blessed to have you and I wouldn't trade the world for all our memories. Thanks for coming out of nowhere.

Love you forever and a day.

Cover Image Credit: Lauren Medders

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Be Nice To Everyone, Even The One Who May Be A Total Jerk to You

You don't know what everyone is going through, so just be nice.

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"You're always so bubbly." "Why are you so nice?"

These are phrases I typically hear, and to tell you the truth, it's because why would you want to be mean? The reason I am nice to everyone is that you honestly don't know what people go through. You don't know if they're giving a fake smile or not because they have problems at home or with their friends. Even if you're having a bad day, don't take it out on someone else because you shouldn't use someone as your own personal punching bag.

People go through so many things in their daily lives. Everyone has their own demons and may be fighting their own fights, so why would you want to add fire to that? Wouldn't you want to be the person that makes someone smile after they have been having a bad day? Making someone's day will honestly make your day because you will feel like you helped someone.

Many people who are bitter at the moment tend to rain on other people's parades, or in other words, they want to stop the positive attitude of someone who is having a good day. This instance has happened to me many times, where people tend to want to ruin the positive attitude I have just because they don't agree with what I say or think that they're above me. When you're mean to a person, you give off the feeling that you think they're less and we live in a country where everyone should be treated equally. Being nice is about being a decent human being and treating the people you meet with kindness and respect, regardless of who they are.

In the past, I have had my share of bullying and people who are closed minded and have negative attitudes. In my experience, I don't even want to continue and engage with them because if you surround yourself with negativity, it will eventually start to rub off on you. Self-care is also choosing not to argue with people who are committed to misunderstanding you, which is exactly why sometimes I just stay quiet and let the other person think they have "won" the argument because, at the end of the day, you believe in what you want. People should know the difference between voicing their opinion and trying to change someone's opinion.

Lastly, being mean doesn't solve anything. As hate crimes have risen in the past couple of years, it is an effect of being mean to people. As a society, we honestly do not need any more hate or bullying or negative attitudes. I understand that some people aren't as friendly or outgoing, but it's simple — if you have an encounter with someone, just make sure to be nice and not put anybody down. Words hurt, too.

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