A house.

If you’re the band, Madness, it’s located at the Playboy mansion, in the middle of the street…?

Houses are seen as large financial investments people make in an effort to improve their lives, a huge financial risk, or in the case of Adam, “The middle-class ideal.”

First: There’s no way that 1950’s spoof was real; the husband isn’t barking at his wife to bake him a chicken pot pie!

Second: A good point is to be made by renting being better than actual ownership; renting allows you more freedom to move whenever you want, no strings attached. Whereas, owning a house kind of puts you in debtor’s prison for the next thirty years. And you would be paying your landlord for room and board, which might be a good friend of yours, unlike paying towards a bank that can be adequately summed up as the CSR opposite the teller in the Huntington commercials. The empathy is not with that one.

But, for many, renting is cheaper than buying. According to a Trulia report, we see that renting is up from 36.1% in 2006 to 41.1% in 2014. Understandable that renting rates would rise in that timeframe; the Recession of 2007-08 and the Housing bubble burst in that same era.

In that same report, the increase of rent is significantly propelled by millennials, with a 9.1% increase between 2006-14, compared to the baby-boomer generation that hardly moved at all. I guess the boomer generation is right on one front: when disaster struck, millennials did rush to safe spaces, whilst they ‘toughed it out.’ But, hey, better to be safe than sorry, right?

The ‘safe’ option may prove to be the smartest. According to Investopedia, there are several reasons as to why renting is smarter than buying:

- No costly repair bills. Your landlord is responsible for all repairs to your home. So, when Ralph Wiggum from The Simpsons flushes a potato down the shitter, Clancy doesn't have to shell out shit tons for a plumber and to stay at the Cheap and Easy hotel.

- No sizable down payment: Sure, most landlords will require you to put up a security deposit, not much more than the first and last month’s rent. The bank will require you to put up roughly a quarter of what the house is worth as a down payment. The only reason you should put down a quarter of what something is worth that you may die in is the Delorean from Back to the Future. Look, you can try gunning it in a vain attempt to go back to happier times, just know you’re going to need that 25% when it comes to funeral costs.

- Fixed amount: Your landlord has the right to raise or lower rent, at the tenant’s notice BUT you know how much you need to budget every month. Whereas, the market can fluctuate, meaning the amount you paid last month may be worthless as time goes on.

According to Suze Orman, this is what you need in order to purchase a house:

So, in her cookbook of buying a house:

- 20% down

- An 8-month emergency fund

- A 700 credit score

Damn, looks like Trump may need to set up a GoFundMe just to get the first part down.

Now, take a look:

Cable news non-sequiturs: