Everyone who knows me knows that I don't do ultimatums. I will never choose the person that says "it's me or them." That may sound conceited or maybe a bit crazy, but really, why should I give up on someone who cares about me enough to let me choose who I talk to, or what I do, for someone who only wants to be a part of my life if they can tell me what to do with it?

I wasn't always like this. For years, I put my own feelings aside and let countless people walk all over me in order to avoid issues and spare feelings. I used to be so scared about hurting people that I would walk around on eggshells in order to keep them happy. I was even naïve enough to let my friends tell me what to do and who to talk to just to avoid conflicts. Eventually, I was going to bed almost every night in tears because of what my so-called friends were encouraging me to do, and how they made me feel when I refused to do so.

Soon, I began to hate the person I saw in the mirror. I was no longer the happy-go-lucky girl that I once was, but instead, a hollowed out version of my old self. I went on like this for a while and then I finally realized something: friends like these aren't worth having.This was a huge wake-up call for me, I realized that I had the power to remove any sort of toxicity from my life and that is exactly what I did, and now, I'm a happier and healthier person because of it.

Now, this is not to say that I won't do anything for my friends. I would walk around the world to help the people that I care about without a single complaint. But there's a difference, they would do the same for me. Since I made this decision I have found out who my true friends are. I've connected with people who care about me, for me, and not for what they could use me for. Simply put, these are the people who are worth giving myself up for, but wouldn't want me any other way.

At the end of the day, deciding to not give into other peoples' ultimatums is one smartest things I have ever done. I now know that nothing is worth the torment of worrying about people who don't care about me enough to do the same. Sure, there are exceptions to every rule, including this one, but at least, I know that I have the power to decide what to choose. Ultimately, this decision has given me better judgement and the confidence to be happy with choices that I make.