The word chivalry dates back to the Middle Ages. It was a system of values such as loyalty and honor that knights were expected to follow. Today, this word is known as an honorable or polite way to treat women. The idea that chivalry is a dying art is a common topic of conversation. The way men are supposed to treat women in this new age is a topic of conversation in general. Opening a girl’s door or always picking up the check can now be seen as a bad thing. There are new norms, and it can be complicated for men to know the right way to treat a woman. Who is to blame? Is it the men, the women, or society as a whole? Why is there an open hole in the ground waiting for chivalry to fall in and be buried alive?
1. The Feminist Movement
Women want their independence, and they “don’t need no man.” Today, women want equality, and they are making it harder for men to be chivalrous. True feminists will pay their portion of the bill at dinner and roll their eyes if a guy tries to open a car door for them. This whole movement promotes the strength of women and the idea that women can do anything men can. Some women feel that they are being looked at as weak or vulnerable if a man does something chivalrous for her.
2. Hookup Culture
We are living in a very casual society. People can hookup for months and even years but never label themselves as an actual couple. People “date” but have no commitment to one another. Dating is done. Relationships are rarely heard of, and because of this, men aren’t expected to be chivalrous and women aren’t expecting men to be either….
3. Norms Have Been Re-Established
What used to be normal now is abnormal. Many girls find it mind-boggling when a guy pulls out her chair at dinner or makes a phone call just to say hello. Those kinds of small gestures would never be looked at as amazing and extremely gentlemanly years ago. Now, guys who do little things like that, which should be considered the bare minimum, are praised for it. Why? Because 90% of men don’t even do the bare minimum!! Men know that women are different now and will do the littlest possible. There is a lack of effort on the man’s part and an overwhelming acceptance of this on the woman’s part.
4. It's Cool Not To Care
This new-age is all about who can care less and who can show the least amount of feelings. When you hear it out loud, it seems sad, but when you really think about it, you know that it’s true. Maybe men don’t want to be chivalrous because it might show that they have an inkling of real feelings for the girl they are “dating.” In the words of Taylor Swift, “this is looking like a contest, of who can act like they care less.” That’s dating today for you.
"Chivalry is not dead; it's just not required anymore."