Whether it be academics, relationship or competitions, I seem to always be looking for consolation in someone, as if all my actions have to be justified. Every passing moment spent working on a project or any notion of success is unconsciously shared with one click on Snapchat or Instagram. As I scroll through my Facebook feed, I often see "I got into Stanford" moments and perhaps someone's fully blossomed gardening success story. With all the effort put into spreading the good news, who are you actually trying to impress?
Perhaps reaching a good grade on a test or scoring the highest in the class may impress your teacher and your classmates, but will it impress yourself? Your Instagram accounts are elaborately set into a perfect "aesthetic," with some photos even photo-shopped to reach utter perfection, but even with the hundreds of likes, who cares? Friends may leave a simply message such as "cute!" or "gorgeous," but are you gaining anything from such messages? A hint of confidence or a rush of reassurance to know that you have friends who support what you are putting out online?
The harsh reality, perhaps no one is watching except for yourself. The countless nights that are spent catching up on homework or the numerous hours hiding away in your room working on a secret project are nothing but for the liberation of the pride confined within ourselves. Being valedictorian is surely a title within itself, yet a year after graduation, no one will remember the moment you have worked so hard for. Life has simply moved on, but your mind is still stuck on the cycle of the past.
Logically, when life is a circle of human desire and greed, satisfaction can never be reached. No matter how many comments you get or how many awards you win, nothing ever seems to be enough. However, when you finally receive the accolade from someone who means a lot to your heart, you may seem satisfied, but are they truly impressed?