Deflated, like a fully inflated balloon that has a sharp object abruptly plunged into it, turning something that a moment ago was full of promise, into a lifeless shell of its former-self. This is analogous to how we as people sometimes feel when something that at first felt extremely positive, is made to feel less substantial due to the emergence of new information, or a change in the circumstances that previously made us feel hopeful. Recently I received some unfortunate news pertaining to a situation that previously was a source of much pride. This news had a shrinking effect. What it shrunk was the sense of accomplishment that had existed prior to being privy to said news.
The new context that I was forced to come to terms with was that something that initially seemed as though it was a tremendous leap forward, in actuality was more of a hop. This is often the point where the bitter taste of disappointment begins to rear its head. It should go without saying that experiencing disappointment is a natural part of the human experience, and some might say that in order to genuinely appreciate successes, there has to a few bumps in the proverbial road here and there.
However, as beings that can be very reactive, it is challenging at times to suppress the urge to have a knee-jerk reaction to an event, whether good or bad. In a moment of joy, we may want to throw up our arms in celebration, and in a moment of crushing sadness, fight to hold back the tears from streaming down our cheeks. Simply being aware of the harsh realities of life does not always make them less painful to stomach. We can be equipped with a baseball glove, prepared for the pitcher to hurl the ball in our direction with all of their might, and still be taken off guard if it is thrown a little faster than we anticipated. So what can be done when we are engulfed in the fog of disappointment, unsure of when the skies will clear?
1. Put Everything In Perspective
In the heat of the moment, losing something small can feel as though we have lost a war. However, once the raw-emotion has subsided, it becomes significantly easier to step back and evaluate a situation for what it truly is. We have to be willing to accept that we’re going to “lose” at times, and perhaps not every goal will work out exactly as we would have envisioned. But these small losses are often temporary, and something better than we could have imagined may be waiting for us if we allow ourselves to be humbled from time to time.
2. Focus On The Positives
When misfortune strikes, we can become so fixated on the bad that we overlook the good things that are happening to us. Do not view life as a sprint, think of it as a marathon. In a sprint, tripping up may be the difference between winning and losing. However, in a marathon, even if you falter, you are still fully capable of finishing, and that is what is important. Do not get caught up with comparing yourself to the marathon’s other runners, and if things seem to be going better for them than for you. Although we are all running together in a sense, we each have our own unique journeys. Keep your eyes on the finish line, and trudge on.
3. Do Not Be Afraid To Vocalize Your Feelings
Everyone copes differently. One person may retreat into themselves, another may submerge themselves in busy-work as a means of distraction. There is nothing inherently wrong either of these methods, especially if you find that they are the most effective way for you to heal. That said; do not be afraid to try something that takes you out of your comfort zone(something that I discuss in more depth here).
Vocalizing your discontent about a situation to a trusted friend or family member can be very cathartic. The people you have a close relationship with are there for a reason, do not make yourself feel like you are a burden to them, they are there to support you
4. Make Plans For The Future, And Move Forward
So what is the next step? One of the best ways to recover from a disappointment, is to figure out where you’re going to go next. Let the disappointment be pushed to the back of your psyche as you maximize your productivity levels and figure out how to advance beyond your current circumstances.
One of the upsides of experiencing a disappointing situation is that it can ignite a fire inside us to work harder than ever before toward accomplishing our goals. Treat it like Play-Doh and mold it into something beneficial that helps you grow.
Press through. You are on earth, living and breathing for a reason. You have a purpose, and potential waiting to be tapped into. Your dreams and aspirations are not out of reach, chase them relentlessly and you will eventually grasp them, even if it’s not at the time you may have pictured. Your patience and perseverance will bear fruit. If you find yourself in the midst of a season of disappointment, pick your head up and look for the silver lining, because it’s there, just waiting for you to find it.