What To Expect When You’re In A Long Distance Relationship

What To Expect When You’re In A Long Distance Relationship

It’s a marathon, not a sprint.
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This one goes out to anyone who has ever been in a long distance relationship, has ever considered being in one, is currently one half of one, and the guy who makes mine worthwhile. My heart goes out to you.

Now, in honor of Valentine's Day, I thought I would write about how I make something as daunting as a long distance relationship work for me.

Whether you are one hour apart or half a world away, distance can be difficult to factor into a relationship. These are a couple of things I picked up on after doing long distance for a year and a half which I would expect to carry over into most other long distance relationships.

For starters, having an open discussion about whether or not distance will be manageable for both of you is a necessity. Having the ability to clearly communicate is even more important than it would be in a normal relationship. When you eliminate physical interactions due to a lack of proximity, your words and actions are what you must rely on to keep the love alive. Talking about where things are headed is scary, but it’s a conversation to have sooner rather than later. It truly puts you at ease once this conversation has been put to rest.

Once you've determined that long distance is the right move for you, the next thing you can do is throw any expectations you may have had out the window and let the wind carry them off. A long distance relationship is really different from one where you live five minutes away from your S/O, and it will change accordingly if either you or your partner need to move away. Anticipate things to go off the rails for a while because they will. But don’t worry. There’s an adjustment period, but you will adapt. Now I'm going to say it louder for those in the back:

Just because things don't transition smoothly doesn't mean that there is something wrong with your relationship.

As you adjust to the distance, remember that being able to set aside time to talk is incredibly important. However, not having a weekly schedule which is set in stone is the best possible thing if you are giving the long distance a try. While having the same plans once a week, every week to talk at 6 pm on Thursdays or watch a movie at 8 pm on Fridays might work for some, I feel that it’s best to avoid anything which could turn spending time with your absolute favorite person in the world into a chore.

Lastly, just because it’s long distance doesn’t mean you should feel lonely. A relationship is supposed to be a positive thing, and if long distance isn’t going to make you happy in the long run, you should really evaluate whether or not it’s the best thing for you.

This has been a very sincere thank you to the dude who managed to be both my best friend and my S/O and makes the long distance worth it.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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An Open Letter To My Boyfriend's Mom

A simple thank you is not enough.
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Your son and I have been dating a while now and I just wanted to thank you for everything.

Wow, where do I start? Ever since the day your son brought me into your home you have shown me nothing but kindness. I have not one negative thought about you and I am truly thankful for that. I first and foremost want to thank you for welcoming me with open arms. There are horror stories of mothers resenting their son's girlfriends and I am blessed there is no resentment or harsh feelings.

Thank you for treating me like one of your children, with so much love but knowing exactly when to tease me.

Thank you for sticking up for me when your son teases me, even though I know it’s all in good fun it's always comforting knowing you have someone by your side.

Thank you for raising a man who respects women and knows how to take responsibility of mistakes and not a boy who is immature and doesn’t take responsibility.

Thank you for always including me in family affairs, I may not be blood family but you do everything you can to make sure I feel like I am.

Thank you for letting me make memories with your family.

There is nothing I value more in this world then memories with friends and family and I am thankful you want and are willing to include me in yours. I have so much to thank you for my thoughts keep running together.

The most important thing I have to thank you for is for trusting me with your son. I know how precious and valuable he is and I won't break his heart. I will do everything I can to make him happy. This means more than you could ever imagine and I promise I will never break your trust.

The second most important thing I must thank you for is for accepting me for who I am. Never have you ever wished I looked like another girl or acted like another girl. You simply love and care for me and that’s all I could ever ask. Every person in this world is a unique different person and understanding that means a lot.

The third most important thing I must thank you is teaching me how to one day in the future treat a potential girlfriend that I may interact with as a mother. I am not a mother, but I one day plan to be. If I ever have a son it is because of how you treated me that I am able to be a humble loving mother to this new face that could one day walk into my door. How you have treated me has taught me how I should one day be in the future and I thank you for that.

This may seem all over the place but that’s how my brain gets when I try and thank you for everything you have done for me. It’s all so much and even the little things are so important so I promise my scattered thoughts are all with good intentions and not meant to bombard you. I just want to get the idea across to you that you are important and special to me and everything you do does not go unnoticed.

Sincerely,

Your Son’s Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Christian Images and Quotes

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Call It A Cliche, But Distance Really Does Make The Heart Grow Fonder

Love is great and all, but when you're miles away it kind of sucks.

Jgorman
Jgorman
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Let me be honest when I say that I did not expect to feel the way as much as I do... you're probably wondering why. I am in an amazing new place and meeting new people on the daily and lastly adventuring more than I ever have in my life. Yet for some reason, my brain always leaves me room to miss him.

Though this is a struggle that I am currently facing it has taught me that distance definitely makes the heart grown even more than I thought it could. It makes me think of all the small things that I often take for granted when I am home. Whether that means just being a 10-minute drive away from his house, or being able to spend weekends together, being so far really makes me miss the simple things.

At the same time, it makes me even more grateful that I have someone that I care so much for that even when I am miles and miles away I wish that I was with. Since I am in such an amazing place, it also makes me wish that he could visit me and that we would be able to share this experience, I don't only want it all for me as I would much rather share it with someone that I love.

Missing someone is definitely a hard part of traveling and exploring but at the same time it makes leaving a little easier because you know that you have someone waiting for you back at home. Someone that is waiting to hear all your stories and ask you all about your adventures once you finally get home for your travels. I love the experience that I am getting and know that leaving here will be very, very, hard yet at the same time the little things back home and that special someone makes it all a little bit easier.

My heart is growing every day and it understands the challenges of distance and a different time zone every day. Though nothing can get in the way of him and me...not even a different time zone.

Jgorman
Jgorman

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