9 Things 1,589 Miles Taught Me About Love

9 Things 1,589 Miles Taught Me About Love

"How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard." -A.A. Milne

My boyfriend and I met last Summer while he was at an internship in Philly. When he had to return home to Puerto Rico a couple of months later, we decided that we cared about each other too much to just let things end there. Starting a long distance relationship didn't feel like a decision; it felt like the choice was already made.

1. Closeness is not measured in miles, but in intimacy.

It's better to be far apart physically and close emotionally than the other way around.Too many people stay in relationships for their convenience, knowing that someone will always be around whenever they need them. When you're in a long distance relationship, staying in it for the convenience isn't an option. Long distance is inconvenient. You have to put in the time and effort to make it work, but when you're with the right person it's worth every mile.

2. Time is precious.

In long distance relationships, time spent together is rare. Even if it's just a weekend trip, those few days are looked forward to eagerly for months prior and mean the world when they finally arrive. The last 20 minutes spent together before one of you has to catch a flight are some of the most cherished moments, especially when you don't know when the next time you'll see one another will be.

3. Patience.

In long distance relationships, you spend the majority of your time waiting. Being patient isn't easy, but getting to talk to the person you love every day is amazing even if you don't get to see them in person as much as you'd like.

4. Technology is the best (and the worst).

We are lucky to live in a time where we can reach someone across the world within seconds. For those of us in long distance relationships, we don't have to wait days to receive letters in the mail like past generations have. Technology has made long distance relationships much easier, but they still aren't easy by any means. Of course, there will be times when the WiFi fails and your Skype date doesn't go as planned, but when you're with the right person, minor inconveniences can't bring you down.

5. If someone really wants to be with you, they will make it happen despite whatever obstacles may stand in the way.

You deserve to have someone who will fight for you, someone who will always make time for you, and someone who will not make excuses as to why they can't be with you.

6. Communication is key.

Long distance relationships survive on words alone, so communication is everything. Being able to stay close with someone without seeing them frequently requires excellent communication skills and a genuine bond.

7. A date is a date, no matter the distance.

Whether it's taking a nap together via Skype, having FaceTime dates, playing games with one another, or watching a movie at the same time, there are so many different ways you can spend time with one another. Just because you're physically apart that doesn't mean you can't still be close

8. You don't have to fight any battles alone.

Even though it's frustrating not being able to see the person you love after a bad day, it's comforting knowing that they're always a call away and that they'd drop everything for you in a second if you needed them. The best feeling in the world is feeling loved, and you don't have to see someone in person frequently to feel that. If you have a supportive partner, distance can separate you physically, but it can't separate you emotionally.

9. Saying goodbye never gets easier.

But one day we won't have to anymore.

Cover Image Credit: Billy McKeown

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Just Because I Check My Boyfriend's Location Every Hour Doesn't Make Me A 'Psycho Girlfriend'

No, checking his location every hour does not make me psycho.

My boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for a few months now. He has come up with describing my actions sometimes as “psycho girlfriend.” As much as this bothered me at first I started to realize there is nothing wrong with my “psycho” actions.

I don’t monitor who my boyfriend hangs out with and I don’t care who he texts, I trust him, but I do watch other things he does.

I probably check his location about once an hour, maybe more if he isn’t texting me back.

This isn’t some way for me to find out if he is with another girl, it’s so I can ensure he isn’t dead in a ditch somewhere. If he was on Snapchat five minutes ago but hasn’t texted me back in 45 minutes, yeah I’ll call him out on it but I'm not actually mad. If he is with friends and not answering me, it’s cool. I just want to be able to make sure I know where he is and that he is alive on a regular basis.

I make him keep his read receipts on for me.

I don’t care if he leaves me on read, I just need to know he is seeing what I’m saying. Half the time, I text him random facts or thoughts I have throughout my day, those don’t always need a response back. However, I do want to know he is acknowledging me through reading my texts.

Yes, from time to time I will spam him and make him respond to my messages so we can make plans or I can know what he is doing with his day but it’s not like I plan out his every move for him or care if he is getting drunk with the boys on a Wednesday, not my issue.

I don’t ask for all of his time or anything. I know he is a busy person. All I ask for him to text me back on a regular basis (once an hour to be exact), for him to allow for me to know where he is at all times and to get one night a week with him.

I don’t plan to show up where he is or anything, I simply just like to know information and get a weekly time with him. I don’t care if I only see him that one night a week, I just want one night with a movie or dinner or snuggles so I can get my boyfriend time.

The rest of the time he is his own person, and I couldn’t really care less about what he does in that time.

Cover Image Credit: Grace Wilkowski

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Be Proud Of Where You Come From

You wouldn't be the person you are today without the place you grew up.

Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted to get out of South Dakota and never really look back. I looked forward to the day where I could pack up all my things and move far, far away, but when that day finally came, it wasn't all that it's cracked up to be.

By no means do I regret moving to Michigan and going to my dream school. I love it more than I could have ever imagined, but being so far from my hometown makes me think about what my home state means to me and how it has shaped me into the person I am today, whether I like the idea or not.

When I tell people at school that I'm from South Dakota, they usually either look shocked or laugh. In high school, I would tell my friends that I couldn't wait to leave my small, boring and plain state, but now that I'm in college, I realize how much I actually love South Dakota.

Now, every time my friends in college make fun of South Dakota, I get the automatic instinct to defend it, which may seem silly, but it is the place I grew up and spent most of my life, so it is always going to be special to me.

I've learned to tell people that I'm from the largest city in South Dakota so that they don't ask questions about whether I have any neighbors, or if I have a buffalo wandering around. I have all these little fun facts to pull out on people if my home state ever needs defending, because the more time I spend away from South Dakota, the prouder I am that I was born in the heartland of America.

Being back home for the summer has reminded me so much of what it means to be a South Dakotan. I used to think that living and growing up in South Dakota limited my options and opportunities, but I know now that that is totally untrue. If anything, it taught me to make the most out of the small stuff. When I was given an opportunity, I knew they wouldn't come around too often so I learned that I had to seize it.

Another thing that I learned is that no one does kindness like South Dakotans, especially people from Sioux Falls. It is a city of nearly 200,000 people, so it's a

well developed area with just enough people that it doesn't feel like a small town, but you basically either know everyone personally or have heard their last name before. Everyone, and I mean everyone is kind, complimentary and has great manners. I have never been in another city where so many people ask how you are and truly mean it, hold the door and even just give a soft smile and wave to strangers.

There is so much more to South Dakota than meets the eye, and it will always hold a special place in my heart. Sioux Falls will always be my home. I will continue to defend it and cherish the memories I had there forever, even if I never move back because after all, it is where I grew up and it's where my family is.

Wherever you come from, be proud of it. I love my home state and will always be a proud South Dakotan.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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