Our childhoods certainly offered us a plethora of weird stuff. Let's take a gander at some odd toys we played with during our youth.

1. Moon Shoes

The commercial looked like Reading Rainbow on acid. Children bounced through space with boots made out of elastic strands. When I opened my packaged Moon Shoes, otherwise known as ankle crackers for ages five and up, I was left looking at the two doughnut-shaped hunks of plastic above. Deluded by the pleasant commercials, I decided to test these bad boys out. My friend and I trudged up a hill with our feet strapped in unstable, elastic chords. We tried to hop up and down, which proved very difficult now that we were lugging excess weight. When we found on a flat surface, we took turns shifting back and forth on the elastic bands. You know when it's snowing out and you're trudging through deep snow,? Now, imagine it's not cold, there's no snow, and you have two plastic bricks taped to your feet like an asshole.

2. Harry Potter Vibrating Broomstick.

It was the height of the Harry Potter craze. After the first movie came out, it's unreal to talk about how much Potter merchandise was sold in stores. There were potion sets where you could make candies, levitating challenge games and Bertie Botts Every Flavor Beans. And of course, there was the controversy involving the Harry Potter Vibrating Broomsticks. I don't think it's worth getting into since the title itself is pretty self-explanatory. Let's just say a lot of these things were sold in stores, and I have suspicions they were used for a very different kind of magic.

3. Cabbage Patch Snack Time Doll.

Okay, I find this one hilarious, but I have a pretty bizarre sense of humor. They sold Cabbage Patch Dolls in the nineties that ate small chips of plastic food. From what I can remember, there was a little motor inside the mouth that would nibble on the food you gave them. Well, keep in mind that motors grind back and forth, and will catch other things as well - in this case, how about human hair? Imagine being a little kid and hugging your Cabbage Patch Doll. Suddenly, the behemoth demon scalps you alive. I mean, I'm not sure if I'm a sadist or something, but look at the image above and try not to laugh.

4. Furbies.

Are they owls? Are they rabbits? Your guess is as good as mine. I will tell you one, though; they never shut the hell up. Furbies were electronic dolls that had their own language and could even communicate with each other. One issue, however, is that they had the tendency to turn on in the middle of the night for no good reason. It was absolutely bone-chilling to wake up to hear these things telling you that they loved you in their messed up chicken Morse code language. Furby owners on the internet have also taken to inventive uses for these things. There are videos of them being blown up by fireworks, crucified and everything in between. In fact, I may have very well accidentally drowned mine when I was five by trying to give it a bath.

5. Wonder Ball

All right, I'm cheating since this is actually a candy, but let's be real; nobody actually ate these things. The chocolate was the kind of cheap milk kind that gave you a nauseating aftertaste. The only reason anyone bought them was to look for the prize inside. It's kind of strange looking back because none of the possibilities were really that terrific. You had a chance of stick-on tattoos, stickers and these weird, grotesque hard candies that tasted like cough syrup. When you put a bunch of seven-years-old in a room with a mystery involving candy, though, I guess it doesn't matter. We begged for these things for no other reason than the element of surprise.