As I watch my friends graduate college after four years, I’m a little sad. Sure, we all have our own journeys and it’s OK to not graduate after the expected time. I am slowly learning that is OK. I hold myself, and my parents do too, to a high standard. I know what is expected of me but with extreme anxiety, and four knee surgeries have held me back. Yet I’m looking back at all the things I have learned in my four years of school, and things I’m thankful I have learned.
I know what I want to do with my life.
In high school, I knew I wanted to major in theatre, but I didn’t know what my minor was going to be. I fought through communications, to English, and finally, have decided to minor in creative writing. Writing is something I have always loved since even before acting, and I want to better myself and write a book series. (About what TBD.)
It is ridiculous we are expected to know what we want to do at the age of 18.
I went into college freshly 18 and was still a little unsure of my goals. They seemed far away and weren’t really reached until I was 20. My mom talks about this topic all the time since she’s worked in the school system and finds it really upsetting because it pretty much leads us up for failure.
It’s OK to hit pause.
I haven’t personally hit pause, but I kind of have with this Spring semester. I have tons of people around me who hit pause after a year of school, or even before they graduate high school. It’s OK to go be in the real world and work the first time, travel the world and volunteer in different countries. It takes time to realize what you want to do in life, and taking a pause is OK. (And can save you thousands of dollars.)
Your past isn’t your future.
I have had a very bumpy past. Two important people in my life have died while I’ve been in school, and every semester I have probably spent at least a month or so on crutches. I’m learning through my past isn’t my future. My future is still bright, and I must keep my head up. There is so much more out there to find and explore.
I am so loved.
My whole life I know I am loved by many. Yet, these past couple of months love has been shining everywhere. My grandmother told me she loved me probably 3 times a day when she was dying, and her love for the world shines through me. Our family friends flew from Alaska to Maine to spend the weekend of her funeral with us. I have been surrounded by so much love these past couple of days it’s contagious. I also am so loved by a boy who keeps my feet grounded and my stomach constantly full of butterflies.
Love is out there no matter where it comes from and when it comes in your journey.
I have learned a lot in the past four years from hard times, late night talks in parking lots, traveling and unsure of what the future holds. Yet I don’t regret anything that has happened in the past four years.