New Year’s has an odd affect on people, a sort of wondrous celebratory emotion filled to the brim with nostalgia, hope, and the feeling that all of your challenges are simply waiting to be tackled to the ground, left in the dust of the last day of the year. On New Year's Eve, one of my oldest friends sent out the message, “My New Year’s resolution is to lose at least fifteen pounds and get that beach body for Spring Break!👌💪🏃” over our old high school group message. I sent back the expected “Good luck! 👍 💖”.

Soon enough, other friends in the message began also congratulating her, sending good vibes and offering their support and even partnership at the gym. Throughout the course of the night and into the small hours of the first day of 2018, I saw countless other notifications on various social media platforms about people being resolute in their determination to spend more hours in the gym, count calories, run more, and eat less.

The support that these people received was heartwarming, to say the least, and as my night progressed and the sun slowly rose again, I found myself wanting to join in on the excitement and the encouragement.

It is never a bad thing to feel good for others and what they have accomplished. The issue with my wanting to join in on the resolutions to lose weight is that I am a very small person with very little body fat. I, therefore, have no reason at all to lose weight - it actually has the potential to be detrimental to my health. When surrounded by other people who were so incredibly excited to lose weight, however, I found myself wanting to join the party, getting caught up in the moment and thinking to myself, How much weight would I need to lose to look like that?

I began to doubt that my body is healthy and beautiful.

I looked at the little pouch of fat over my tummy, saw the jiggle of my thighs, and felt my confidence in my body falling. This sudden onset of body negativity was brief, and it wasn’t long before I had snapped myself out of this line of thought and re-convinced myself that my body is fine.

I was, however, still concerned and even a little frightened by how easily I - someone who is in peak condition and has never had body image issues - was influenced to believe that my body was inadequate. I realize now that the problem wasn’t that I am unhealthy or that I am failing at something - the problem was that I, like so many others in the world, have been conditioned to believe that my body, if it is not exactly like those that we see modeling clothing on billboards and in advertisements, is wrong, unhealthy, and ugly.

A lot of people equate skinniness with health and assume that only certain weights are healthy. In reality, everyone has a different BMI and different builds and metabolisms that require different maintenance levels to be truly healthy. And beyond that, healthy doesn’t mean a flat tummy or thighs that don’t squish when you sit down or arms that don’t jiggle. All of that is normal and healthy and amazing. So it’s hard to stand in front of a mirror and see how healthy your body really is when society only shows abs and thigh gaps and a very specific body type (which, don’t misunderstand, is certainly a possible physique to have, but not a realistic one for everyone to have).

There is also the issue of equating your worth to your beauty as if your beauty is what you owe the world for other people having to look at you and acknowledge your existence. I personally don’t think everyone is beautiful, but the fact is that I don’t think that everyone needs to be beautiful either.

A person’s physical appearance is a very small part of who a person is - there are so many other traits to focus on and draw strength and self-empowerment from. Whether or not you are perceived by everyone else as attractive or not takes up far too much concern, especially when there are so many other qualities that you can strive for to improve.

Could I look better this year than I did last year? Definitely. Do I need to look better? Absolutely not. I know I am healthy and strong and my body is an extension of the work and love that I give myself and that others in my life have given me. So yes, exercise for your health, and no, there isn’t anything wrong with wanting to be fit. That is, there is nothing wrong with it as long as you don’t place your worth in looking a certain way.There is nothing wrong with having goals for your body, as long as you make these goals because you want to be the best that you can be, rather than out of a desperation to fulfill someone else’s standards.This year, don’t aim for a number. Your body - like the rest of you - is worth more than the numbers it is labelled with. Our variation in shape and size is a part of what makes each of us unique. Our acceptance of that is a part of what makes us strong. Our conviction of that is what makes us resolute.