I honestly loved being 12 years old. I turned 12 at the end of 2009, just at the turn of the century, when Ke$ha made her debut with “Tik Tok,” girls had Justin Bieber taped to their lockers, and people thought something was wrong with you if you didn’t own at least one shirt from Abercrombie & Fitch (in fact, people thought something was wrong with you if your entire wardrobe didn’t consist of A&F). It was the age of smudgy eyeliner, big hoop earrings, and colored skinny jeans. These days, however, 12-year-olds (born in 2005) look up to stars like Kylie Jenner for fashion and beauty inspiration, and would rather shop at Forever 21 than Justice.
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Usually, when we call out 12-year-olds, it’s because they are ignorant, immature, or just don’t know a damn thing about the world. But I recently spent a week with my 12-year-old cousin, and it was an eye-opening experience. I started to remember that even though these new pubescent pre-teens look different than we did, they still have the same ardent questions about life, adulthood, and society that we had (and still have). Maybe if we start listening to the 12-year-olds, instead of bashing them, we older people can learn a thing or two.
Here are 12 lessons my 12-year-old cousin taught me:
1. Everyone has insecurities.
Sometimes we get so caught up with photoshopped models on Instagram that we forget that they’re just people too. Even people who seem perfect still have things about themselves that they don’t like, and that’s okay. It’s what makes us human.
2. You don't have to be glued to social media 24/7.
I saw how attached to our phones we are when my cousin would sit next to me and sigh, "you're on your phone again? Talk to me". I realized that sometimes, spending quality time with people is so much better than updating people where you are.
3. Take personal pictures of yourself, your friends, and your family all the time.
This one is extremely important. And I don't mean Snapchat pictures that last only 24 hours; I mean REAL photos in your camera roll, whether they are candids, silly photos, or inundated with filters. Everywhere we went with my cousin she screamed, “LET’S TAKE A PICTURE!” It’s important to have your camera roll stacked up with pictures of you being with people you love, for memory’s sake.
4. You're never too young to get into politics.
What I loved about my cousin was that every night my family and I tuned into CNN, she was right there with us. Even if she didn't understand what was going on, it was still important for her to know what was happening with our country because she's part of the generation that will soon be making nationwide decisions. AWARENESS IS PIVOTAL.
5. Speak your mind, even if everyone else is silent.
Twelve-year-olds are known to not have a filter with the things they say, but sometimes, that's a good thing. Opinions are what keep us from assimilating into the drab repetition of everyday life. Be opinionated, but not rude.
6. You honestly might have to wait a few years to have your life together — and that's OK!
I got sick of people my age on twitter buying their own cars, buying their own houses, getting married, and having kids until I realized that not everybody's life path is the same. For some, certain things will take longer.
7. If you don't like it, drop it.
I literally saw my cousin pick up a pair of sunglasses, try it on, hate it, take it off, and move to the next one while I loitered around a few pairs. Sometimes we keep things around that we don’t like just for the hell of it. It’s a waste of energy, time, and space. If you don’t like it, get rid of it and then move onto the next thing.
8. Some things are simpler than you think.
As adults, we seem to over-complicate things a lot for no reason. Not every complicated problem will have a complicated solution. Sometimes, the best solutions are the simplest ones.
9. Be yourself.
People hear this one all the time; even though it's so cliche, it's needed not just for 12-year-olds but also for adults. Again, we're so used to assimilating to what other people are doing that we don't even realize it. Don't be mundane. Be you, and be extraordinary.
10. You're young; people will constantly quickly make their way into your life and make their way out, just as quickly.
We really shouldn't get too caught up with people who decided to leave our lives. We spend our time obsessing about what could have been instead of focusing on the fact that we probably have 50+ more years on this earth to meet new people. We won't be around the same individuals forever.
11. You're only this age once — so enjoy every moment and have fun.
It's cliche, but it's true. I wish when I was 12, I just focused on having fun with my friends instead of worrying about growing up. Worrying doesn't make memories; it's up to you to do the things that'll make your life worthwhile.
12. You have the power to change the world.
DO NOT MAKE YOUR DREAMS IDLE! Unrealistic dreams sometimes trump practicality. We are the upcoming generation about to leave college and get thrown into the real world. All the upcoming doctors, artists, lawyers, teachers, journalists, politicians, movie producers, and more have the power to change the world. Don't sacrifice your dreams for practicality. We are the future.