“Why don’t you have a boyfriend?”

This question always seemed to creep up on me and induce a tad bit of anxiety. Whether it was at family get-togethers at the holidays or just meeting new friends, this question always left me feeling empty and, if I’m being completely honest, a little angry.

It’s not like I have never thought about the question myself, so I can’t be entirely too upset when others ask me this. But naturally, I began to wonder, “Yeah, why am I still single?”

I constantly see friends, whether from high school or now in college, who seem like they are always in a relationship. I see photos of their boyfriend surprising them with flowers at work or pictures from their date night where they went to “the most adorable” restaurant downtown. Now, as hard as it is to admit, a part of me was genuinely a little bit bitter, which only furthered the questioning of my own singleness.

I’ve always just chalked it up to the fact that I am simply “picky." I’ll be the first to admit it: I set the bar pretty high. I have high standards for myself and expect the same in return. Sure, I’ve been asked out by guys, but why have I never found the one? I’ve never been in a serious relationship. I’ve never had a boyfriend to surprise me with flowers. I’ve never had those regular date nights on Friday evenings.

What I didn’t realize was a relationship had already been unfolding right before my very eyes. My Lord and Savior had been the one waiting all along to love and accept me with open arms.

It was with him that I first had to establish a relationship with. I could not give my heart to someone else without first giving it up to him. He knew that my heart would not be ready for a relationship without establishing one with him first. He needed to be the satisfaction in my life that I couldn’t gain from anyone else. When placing the Lord above all else you gain a secure foundation that will never waver.

“For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is in him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken. On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God. Trust him in all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us.” Psalm 62:5-8

I know that in this waiting time, God is preparing my heart and mind for someone absolutely amazing. Someone who will draw me closer to him, someone who will challenge and motivate me every day in my faith and someone who also places the Lord above our relationship. But for now, I wait.

Before setting out to look for what we want, we need to start acknowledging what we already have.