The moment I stepped onto my school's campus, I automatically felt as if it were home. There was not a doubt in my mind that I loved my college. Yet, there was one downside to this perfect school: the uber small town surrounding me. And what was surrounding that town was far worse: vast "nothingness."

The small town atmosphere that so many people run to is exactly the thing I always find myself running from.

99.999% of the time I feel completely out of the place. Many people in this middle of nowhere town come from even more nowhere towns. Contrary to these types of people, I have always lived in the hustle and bustle. Most of my childhood, and even throughout my early tweens, I spent my life in the crazy city of San Diego. Now, I reside in perhaps the busiest part of Virginia: Northern Virginia.

Every weekend, I spend my time fleeing the small area my school is in and travel to a more comfortable area in Richmond, or sometimes I even make the 3 1/2 hour drive back home just to feel back in place once again. Part of my loathing for small areas definitely stems from my need for stimulation; I just get so bored so easily and there's not much to do in the middle of nowhere that satisfies me.

I'm not exactly sure why small town life is so toxic to my soul, especially when it's beneficial to people around me. To be honest, I think I just need a little chaos to properly function. As much as I can't stand hours of traffic, I think I find beauty in being able to weave through four lanes of traffic in under a minute. You just can't do that sort of think on a single lane, country back road.

Also, the retail therapy I am able to do in my hometown is much more relaxing to me than going out for a hike or a walk around town. I think that the closest comparison to the way I feel in my small town is how Zoe Hart felt walking into Bluebell, for anyone out there who has watched Hart of Dixie. It's like everyone is speaking a different language, and no matter how hard you try to fit in, you are always going to be on the outside.

I think the most comforting thing about the big city lifestyle is, while there are always a million people around you, nobody is in your business unless you specifically invite them to be. Whenever I'm back in my college town, I feel like if I have a secret, everybody who I've ever made small talk with knows it.

It's kind of funny, even though there are more buildings, people, cars, trash, and, well, everything in the city, I consistently feel more claustrophobic and overwhelmed in the middle of nowhere.