Fellas, Switching Out Toxic Masculinity For Your Inner Femininity Is Super Hot

Fellas, Switching Out Toxic Masculinity For Your Inner Femininity Doesn't Mean You're Gay

It does not make you gay to care about your appearance.

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These past few years, I have seen more and more men experimenting with wearing makeup and feminine clothing. Even though many of them are supported by their peers for making that decision, there is still a huge stigma surrounding the idea of men being anything less than 100 percent masculine.

One of the most common comments made towards men that have chosen to embrace a more feminine style is that they are gay. This is extremely harmful because not only is that man being shamed for his style choices, but gay people are disrespected by being used as insults.

You cannot tell what someone's sexuality is based on the way they present themselves. Stereotypes are not accurate and reinforcing them only further oppresses a marginalized group. The stereotypes of being gay are what caused many men in my life to become hypermasculine as a way to prevent themselves from coinciding with any of those stereotypes. It is also led to them bullying men that were gay as a final attempt to solidify that they were straight.

It is ridiculous that when a man cares about his appearance he is called gay because wanting to look like the best version of yourself is just practicing self-care. Men are taught that engaging in activities that require you to spend more time in front of the mirror, such as caring for your skin, putting on makeup, and styling your hair, is something that only a gay man would do.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with a man wanting to look presentable. Of course, looks are not everything and should by no means be what you focus on the most, but it is still important to make sure you take the time to take care of yourself. Men should not feel that they need to look like slobs that never give their appearance a second thought. If you seriously believe that that is what a "true man" would do, then I pity you. While your skin is breaking out and your hair looks like it has not been combed in months, the supposed "gay men" you are taunting for looking put together are actually having their appearance complimented.

I have also seen way too many men falling into a rut of wearing gym shorts with a t-shirt because of the same idea that it is gay to care about your looks. Your fashion choices do not dictate your sexuality. You can be a straight man that decides to wear a skirt and heels and still be just as straight as a man in jeans and sneakers.

Clothing is just a way to express one's individuality and men should not shy away from trying trends that are considered feminine out of fear of being seen as less of a man. Fashion does not follow the gender constructs that our society has created. We should be inspired by the environment that the fashion industry has created that promotes being unique and creative and apply that to our daily lives. Instead of trying to force men into a box of what society expects them to look like, we should encourage them to experiment with both masculine and feminine styles.

I understand that there are also men that are not interested in makeup or feminine clothing, and that is completely fine. I just want men to keep an open mind when it comes to their own appearance or the appearances of other men. I am tired of the word gay being thrown around as an insult or as a threat to what a man could become if he was not careful about how he presents himself. Leave your toxic masculinity behind and learn to embrace your inner femininity.

Cover Image Credit:

@durmas__k

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10 Outfits Every College Girl Wears To Class At Least Once

You can thank me later.
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It's happened on more than one occasion.

The occasion of being called out more than once for dressing down for class and by "down" I mean some of the haters we hate to love claiming that they can't see the shorts we're wearing under the oversized band tee on our way to class.

Contrary to popular belief, yes I'm not oblivious to how my choice of outfits for class tends to shift on the more comfortable side and yes, I am aware that it looks like I'm not wearing pants, I like it that way.

Every girl in college wears what they feel is comfortable enough to wear in a 2-hour lecture and these are my ideas of comfort.

1. The infamous oversized tee with Nike shorts.

I'll say it right now, I have a variety of assorted Soffee and Nike shorts that I pair with almost every oversized tee I own and it's my go-to for those 8 AM math lectures.

2. Oversized tee with leggings and riding boots.

Once the first red, yellow and orange leaf is found on campus grounds, you know you're about to see a swarm of college girls, like me, sporting riding boots in every shade of brown. Jeans optional.

3. Oversized tee with leggings and rain boots.

Once the first rainfall hits campus, you better believe you'll see this same 'fit paired with Hunter boots in almost every color.

4. The "I'm going to the gym right after class, I SWEAR" look.

Whether or not I have plans to go to the gym after class or not, I'm probably in my gym gear 4 times of the week and I'm not ashamed by it.

5. Jeans.

I've always had a hate/hate relationship with wearing jeans when I absolutely do not have to and here's why: they make my derriere completely disappear. When (and if) you catch me wearing jeans in lecture hall it's probably because someone paid me a large sum of money to do so.

6. Your boyfriend's flannel paired with... you guessed it, your favorite pair of leggings.

This is probably one of the many flannels I've stolen from my boyfriend and certainly not the last one. Paired with another favorite standard black leggings, you can't go wrong with this outfit to snooze in.

7. The baseball hat and quarter zip ensemble.

One of my all times favorites, you can't go wrong with a zipper up 3x too big for your body and a baseball hat you honestly forgot where you got it from. We also can't forget our infamous black leggings.

8. Your "walk of shame" outfit.

Now, this doesn't mean you roll up to Intro to Psychology wearing what you wore to the lacrosse mixer the night before, no. This is more of the outfit you so quickly had to throw on in a span of two minutes because you left so and so's apartment downtown an hour too late.

9. A v-neck.

Another one of my favorites.

10. Dresses (or anything even relatively formal).

Disclaimer: I personally would never come to class wearing this but gigantic kudos to cute a** girls that do decide to wear this because you look good.

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'Sissy, Why is That Boy Wearing Makeup?'

June is time to celebrate equality.

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This past weekend, I went to the mall with my family. It was just a normal family excursion, and I wanted to walk into Sephora to show my mom a perfume I liked. We go inside, and my mother and I drift away from my dad and 6 year old sister, Sierra. I showed her the perfume I thought smelled amazing (Roses de Chloé) and we look for my sister and father to exit the store. As soon as we leave, my little sister grabs my hand and asks, "Sissy, why is that boy wearing makeup?"

This was the first time my little sister has ever asked about anything like this, and I wanted to make sure I gave her an answer. I turned to her and said, "Sierra, sometimes there are boys who wear makeup, and girls who may dress like boys. People are allowed to wear what they want, it doesn't matter." Sierra looks up at me, says, "Oh okay," and that was the end of it.

Sharing this experience to say, HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!

So thankful to live in a country where all sexual orientations get a day to celebrate their love. That's what this world needs more of-- love. It shouldn't matter who it is, where they are from, the color on their skin, or their gender identity.

When Sierra was born, I always wondered when this conversation would come up. I wondered what I would say, how she would react to it, and how she would be exposed to it. Like I consistently preach, everything happens for a reason, and I'm glad Sierra was able to get exposure and receive an immediate answer. Love is love, and I will forever stand by that.

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