To The Girl I Used To Be
Lifestyle

To The Girl I Used To Be

I don't miss you, but I love who you've become.

288
Hailea Shallock

I don’t miss you. I don’t miss the sad little girl with braces and curly brown hair. I don’t miss the nights you spent crying, wondering where you went wrong. I don’t miss the way you used to blame yourself for everyone else’s problems. I don’t miss the way you used to overly apologize for things that weren’t even your fault. I don’t miss the struggle you thought you had to make to be considered beautiful. I don’t miss the way you constantly needed other peoples approval. I don’t miss the way you let people walk all over you, and I certainly don’t miss the way you used to give everything you had until there was nothing left to give, not even to yourself. I don’t miss you.

Honestly, looking back now I feel bad for you. I wish the years you spent struggling were different, I wish I could’ve helped you then. I wish I could have changed you. But, it feels good to know I’m a better me now because of everything you went through. I never really got the chance to say goodbye to you, but I hope you find it in yourself to forgive me for wanting to leave you behind. The girl you were is gone. Since then, you have fallen in and out of love, you have felt the unbearable pain of a heartbreak, you’ve lost friends and family members, and your plans for your future have changed immensely. It saddens me to say that you grew up so fast, but without the things you went through I’m not sure I’d be so strong. You made mistakes, you learned from them.

I really do need you to know some things though, things I have wanted to tell you for so long.

The first thing I want you to know is that you shouldn’t worry so much. I know life is rough and things are pretty wild, but life is a roller coaster ride of emotions and you’ll figure things out along the way. I know it’s hard to sit back and let things happen but I want you to stop fighting for things that you cannot change. Stop wasting so much time on people and things that don’t and won’t matter later on in life. You’ll be able to enjoy yourself so much more if you learn to let go.

You’re beautiful, whether you think so or not. From your thick hair to the uniqueness of your name, you are like no one else. Your looks shouldn’t define you now and they definitely aren’t going to define you later. Your beauty falls deeper than the makeup you have and the way you wear your hair, it is who you are as a person that shows just how beautiful you really are. I know some days it’s hard to believe, but I promise you that you are truly stunning.

Everything happens for a reason. That best friend that left you? She’s not worth it. The bad grade you got on that quiz? The stress isn’t worth it. The boy that left you crying that night? Definitely not worth it. Learn to accept everything that life throws at you. I promise you the things happening now will not be important later on in life. Don’t dwell on the “could haves,” think about the “what’s nexts.”

Things will get better, trust me. I know things right now might not exactly prove that to you but they will. You have such a bright future ahead of you there is absolutely no time to be stuck on things that are only going to hold you back. Live in the moment and give everything you love your all, as long as it won’t drain you of your happiness.

Last but not least, you come first. You are worth so much more than you give yourself credit for. I wish nothing but the world for you, and I hope you find that soon. You should be your number one priority. Take care of yourself, love yourself, and be yourself. You are so worried about making others happy that you are forgetting about your happiness. I promise putting yourself first isn’t selfish as long as it’s for the right reasons. Be genuine and do not let anyone change who you are.

I love who you’ve become. I love the young woman with bright eyes and hair just the way you like it. I love the nights you spend laughing with real friends. I love the way you have started to help people with their problems rather than blame yourself for them. I love the way you don’t apologize for anything unless what’s happening is actually your fault. I love that you have accepted your flaws and have realized just how perfectly imperfect you are. I love that you have stopped looking for others approval. I love that you stand up to your demons and you have become a brick wall that no one can break down, and I certainly love the way you put your all into everything you love without ever losing your happiness. I love who you’ve become.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Health and Wellness

This Survey Shows How Quarantine And Drinking Relate, And I Can't Say I'm Surprised

"5 o'clock somewhere" is more of a guideline now than ever.

As it stands, and my friends and I are finally 21. We're extremely excited to be able to go out to bars and "get lit" as the kids say, but due to the pandemic, all of our plans have been put on hold. We'd rather wait and go when it's safe than risk spreading the infection and hurting our loved ones. So, we've all been quarantining apart, getting on the occasional wine zoom call. This made me wonder if anyone else our age were doing the same thing.

Then, I discovered this survey: We Surveyed Millennials And Gen Z About Their Quarantine Drinking Habits — Cheers. Here are 3 things that I discovered through the survey results.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

5 Easy Summer Mocktail Recipes You Can Make With Items You Probably Already Have On-Hand

Keep these drinks in mind next time you're visiting your local farmer's market — you might want to grab some extra mint and limes.

With Summer 2020 in full swing comes the addition of many fresh fruits and vegetables to brighten up your dinner plate, but also your glass! Farmers markets are my personal favorite place to look for produce that is in season to make fun mocktails with.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

5 Ways To Celebrate The 4th of July — Without Fireworks Or Social Gatherings

We created a list of things to do since social distancing may create a dent in our typical, planned traditions.

With the Fourth of July on Saturday, the usual tradition of popping fireworks, grilling out, and being surrounded by family has been modified due to the pandemic. Whether you're a loner or surrounded by family, there will most likely be some changes to your celebrations.

For weeks on social media, people across the country have been complaining that they have been subjected to fireworks going off at all times of the night into the early morning. This has sparked concern and questions about why this is happening and how are people even obtaining the fireworks.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

Carb And Cheese Lovers, Unite — These Are The Best Mac And Cheese Recipes On The Internet

Whether you need to get through the current pandemic or want to spice up your Fourth of July celebrations, these mac and cheese recipes will do just that.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BxIKdnMHcGr/

My favorite food is mac and cheese, and it always has been. All it requires is noodles and cheese — it's so simple to make. Although it's my favorite, it can also get kind of mundane because it's such a simple recipe. This, of course, has led to many people all over the world experimenting with the American staple.

With our lives currently being turned upside down due to the pandemic, a lot of people are seeking comfort. These are scary times, and in order to make it day-to-day, we need to have our favorite foods as a standby. These recipes can also be used during your celebration of the Fourth of July.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Odyssey Webinar: Writing Reviews About Your Favorite Products

See you on Wednesday, July 8 at 4:00 p.m. EST.

On July 8, our Lifestyle editor is hosting a video webinar focused on writing reviews about your favorite brands and products –– and you're invited! You must have an Odyssey account to attend.

Keep Reading... Show less
Tips

Odyssey Templates: Review A Product You Love

Rave about that product here as much as you have been to your friends.

There are few things less satisfying than giving someone a product recommendation only to find out they actually took the recommendation and love it just as much as you told them they would. There exists a great sense of gratification in knowing someone valued your opinion enough to go out and make a purchase based on it.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

17 Things To Make You Feel GOOD This Week

Because some purchases are just necessary.

Y'all, we're struggling. You don't even have to tell me, I know. What a mess we're all in, right? This year is not going how we planned and the world has turned into one giant struggle bus. I guess you could be super philosophical about everything happening for a reason, but sometimes life is just hard.

There are plenty of ways to bring yourself out of whatever rut you're in. You could go for a run, have a snack, or read a book. Or, if you're really looking for an adrenaline rush, go shopping. This is obviously not going to solve the world's problems with one swift click of the "checkout" button, but hey, it may just give you the little boost you need today.

Keep Reading... Show less

- Blissfully unaware that butt-care beyond squats was even something I should be considering in my self-care routine, I tried one of Bawdy Beauty's butt masks for the first time a month ago.

- I've never really given my butt a second though till I took a look at improvements that could be made with the mask — if one of the hydrating, firming, detoxifying, or brightening masks in the kit I received could either smooth out cellulite or tone my skin a bit more, I wasn't going to complain.

- Each Bawdy Beauty sheet mask comes in an individually-packaged sheet, soaked with a serum I massaged into my skin after removing said sheet. The clay butt mask comes in a convenient stick format I simply draw on to my skin and leave to set for about 10 minutes before hopping into the shower.

- I set a goal of committing myself to butt-care every day for one month. Between the regular use of sheet masks, clay masks, and their CBD Butt Balm in between, I didn't have many expectations.

- I thought the whole concept may just be a gimmick, but my butt has never looked so toned in my life, and the cellulite I had is almost completely gone. I wear one every single day when I get the chance.

I'm incredibly skeptical when it comes to marketing ploys and gimmicks in the beauty world. I'll be the first cynic to try out the latest serum on the market every influencer is raving about just to negate every grandiose claim it makes.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments