Mom,

This year hasn’t been particularly easy for you; it hasn’t been easy for any of us, really. It’s been a year unfortunately riddled with loss. But you have been there, fighting and working to make ends meet. You’ve shown so much strength, courage, love, and support for Alisha, dad, and me.

I want you to know that I will be forever thankful for all that you’ve done for our whole family.

When I thought about writing this article, I knew I wanted it to be about thanking you. ’Tis the season, I suppose. But lately, I’ve been MIA — I have been busy studying for finals and making friends — holy crap! That’s a miracle.

But what should I thank you for? It’s funny that I have to think about what specific things I want to thank you for. You do so much for me; paying my student loans, random trips to come see me, taking care of me for eighteen years…

Thank you for supporting me and my sometimes my stupid decisions. Thank you for letting me make mistakes and letting me learn from them. It probably hasn’t been easy. Sometimes I wish you could just take care of the stupid stuff for me. But I’m an adult now. You live three hours away. I kinda have to take care of that stuff myself.

It was so difficult to leave you when I moved away. It may only have been three hours, which isn’t all that ridiculous given that I have a friend from Russia who hasn’t seen his family since he flew in back in August. I thought I was losing my best friend and that I would never get to see you again.

We make do, as we always do. Phone calls (lots and lots, most of them ending with me in tears), going grocery shopping over Facebook video when I was homesick.

You always get excited when I talk about making new friends. It’s always been hard for me to connect with people. So when I call you to tell you about how my new friend and I went out for dinner and the movies, you were so happy. And when I told you I was writing for the Odyssey, you told me you are so proud of me and that I was putting myself out there.

You constantly remind me how proud of me you are, over messenger, the phone, or through a cute gif when I’m feeling stressed out. I doubt myself a lot, but you don’t. You fiercely support me and believing in me.

You’re always there, no matter what. I can always count on you.

When I was going in for invasive hip surgery at five, you were the one who walked with me down the terrifying hallway as I sobbed so hard my chest hurt. I was terrified. Before the doctor’s put me to sleep, they let you come in and tell me everything was going to be okay. And you were there in the recovery room when I woke up.

You took me to all my physical therapy appointments. And you still take me to all my doctor’s appointments. You’ve sat through a couple tattoo appointments. You sit through phone calls when I’m crying because I’m stressed and/or homesick.

You’ve always taken care of me. You’re my biggest supporter, Mom, and I want you to know that your support, your love, all that you do for me — it doesn’t go unnoticed.

I love you, Ma.