For the longest time, I was blind. I thought that there was love between us. There were so many signs I missed that made me realize that you could never love me the way I needed to be loved. I hated the way you grabbed me when you were angry, and the lack of your presence during my darkest hour cut deep. You could have never loved me.

I was always the one to give you everything you ever wanted: love, compassion, time, intellect, and selflessness. However, it was never enough for you. You had to be perfect with your words and tell me everything I wanted to hear. Instead, I wish you would have just told me what I needed to hear so I could just get up and move on with my life. You had to go and flirt and be with other women. I was never your first priority and it really sucked.

I am writing this to let you know that I am now learning to live without you. I am waking up without you, learning without you, being happy without you, and living my life to the fullest without you. You have opened my eyes, not to what love is, but what love is not. Love is not abandonment and disloyalty. It is not lack of support and compassion. Most importantly, it is not aggression and disrespect.

I have learned from you that I do not have to constantly prove myself to someone that will never prove to be worthy of having me. I also do not have to constantly commit acts of selflessness to someone that is all about themselves. The day that I stopped going down a one-way street with you was the day I started loving myself and feeling alive again.

I cannot say that being a single woman is easy. However, you have taught me that being single is so much better than selling myself short and putting myself last. I know that God should always come first, but I know I should never be last.

Finally, you taught me that it is OK to not be OK. I always had to be happy around you. You never wanted to be around me when I was sad or depressed. You always thought that a relationship was supposed to be sunshine and rainbows. However, you forgot that rain comes before the rainbow. You never bothered to show up at that hospital when depression made me hit rock bottom and I needed help. I may have needed help, but I needed love more than anything else. I was so foolish to think that you could provide me with such. Now that I am free from you, I can cry and not feel guilty about it. I can be angry and not feel the need to apologize for how I feel. I can be an actual person now, thanks to you.

Many people have told me that I should hate you, but I do not. I highly appreciate the time that I had with you. Without that, I would not have became the strong woman I am today. Thank you for showing me that you could not love me, so that someone else eventually can.