I used to think you would be my bridesmaid, maybe even my maid of honor. I used to think you would be the Godmother of my children, and I always thought we would be, pardon my cliche, friends forever. However, life doesn't always go the way you want it to, and it loves to throw a proverbial wrench in many of the plans you make. I know that sometimes the people in your life are only temporary, it just hurts that you turned out to be one of those people.
We have a lot of beautiful memories together. Hearing a song we liked, or seeing one of our old hang out spots, bring the most bittersweet feeling you could imagine. You were there for me through deaths in the family, and I was there for you through nasty breakups (even if I told you from the get-go they were no good). Even though it's been a while, everything still reminds me of you, and I can't help but hate you for that a little.
I don't think I ever told you how much it hurt that we just stopped talking. I checked my phone for texts from you constantly, and I'm ashamed to admit how often I stalked your Facebook and Twitter. I wanted to know if you still cared, and I was too damn stubborn to pick up the phone first. For that, I'm sorry. However, phones work two ways, and maybe you were too stubborn as well. I also wish I could have fixed things when they started going wrong, but you didn't let me close enough to do that. For that, I hope you are sorry.
I know this might sound dramatic, but please don't try to reconnect with me. We both know too much time has passed for us to fix things, even though I'm sure neither of us knows what really happened. I had to learn to live without you, and that's hard to do when we used to be attached at the hip. I used to know you better than I knew myself, but now I'm not even sure I'd know it if I saw you on a crowded street. To be honest, I don't know if I'd even stop if I did. To be honest, I don't think we'd have much to say to each other over coffee. I think we both know it would be best not to put ourselves through that.
There's so much of my life that you've missed. Likewise, there's a lot about you I don't know. I used to hear all of your thoughts, fears, and hopes for your future. Now, I'm not even sure where you're living. You don't even know what I want to be when I grow up (I changed my mind, I want to be a lawyer now). To be perfectly honest, I've realized it's a waste of my time thinking about you. There are people in my life that aren't temporary, they plan on staying. They work out problems with me, and they've been there, unwavering, unlike you. So, I'm letting you go. Not to be hateful, or spiteful. I'm letting you go to spare myself the heartache.
