In our culture, family means a lot. Pretty much any culture dictates that family is the most important thing that you can have. Elders have to be respected, wisdom has to be passed down, parents know best, are only some of the edicts passed around in our culture. However, some people do or say things that do not necessarily correlate with what they preach and in the process, they dump all the people that supported them.
You walked back into our lives like there weren't 12 years that passed between us. The last time you were around, I was a kid that didn't know any better about what was happening. You left and pushed the blame that my parents drove you out. You were always very good at covering your tracks and everyone else in our extended family believed you because you could never do any harm.
I respected you for a long time. My parents taught me that you were the shining emblem of a person who was good and honorable. Growing up, you were hailed as brilliant and smart, something that we should be achieving in our lives. However, there was that arrogance and swagger about you that suggested that you were the only one that knew what you were talking about. Everything from any member of our family would look to you for guidance as if you had the right to control anyone's life. That kind of mild suggestion that you were better than anyone else pushed our family away from yours.
You saw me like this kid that would never amount to anything. I freely admit that I was wilder and crazier when I was younger but it was so easy to pick on my imperfections and point them out for everyone to see. In your absolution, I was most definitely dumber than your kids, socially awkward than my sister, and different than anyone else. So it didn't matter to you that you basically wrote me off because the moment you did, I tried to write you off.
But you came back anyway. For whatever reason, you wanted to come back and see us. To be perfectly frank, I thought that you were here to shove it in our face that you were fine without us. But as much as you had that same look of arrogance, as I've known you to have, you were calmer, older, and hardened in ways I could not figure out. To say it was a pleasure meeting is an understatement, but I would like to think that you got answers to the questions that you never asked.
So no, I think after seeing you again, I'm pretty certain that I don't need you. I never needed you to validate me as a person. Writing you off wasn't the best bandaid that I used in the last 12 years but I know now that my self-worth is never going to be based on your judgments. I wish you better than I did before but I'm ok that the last thing I saw was your backside walking away and I'm complete knowing that you see this version of me.