Horse people – we’re crazy. We’d take the smell of hay mixed with manure at 6:00 a.m. on a Saturday over the scent of our favorite candle any day. We didn’t choose this life — it chose us. No, seriously. I’m not trying to be corny. We wouldn’t change our love for horses even if we could. If we had the option to change it, we’d only do it for our bank accounts, because we’d save ourselves a hell of a lot of money.
When I was four years old, I started asking my mom and dad for a pony. They never bought me one. They never even thought twice about it. Money didn’t grow on trees back then, and it still doesn’t to this day. Although I was privileged in other ways, I didn’t have parents who supported the idea of horseback riding. I didn’t have parents who grew up on a farm and wanted to pass on the sport to their children. What they did do was purchase me horseback riding lessons at the age of five, and I am forever grateful that they did. While every little girl’s dream is to own a horse, that didn’t matter to me, because I still got to do the one and only thing I loved — riding them. And, 17 years later, here I am still doing it.
The point I’m trying to make about my parents not buying me a horse is not that I wish I had it differently. I grew up blessed with everything I needed and more. The point I’m trying to make is that without that, I really did have to learn everything I know about the sport through lessons and my primary source of knowledge, a trainer.
In my almost 20 years of the sport, I’ve only had about three or four different trainers. And while I have to say that my current one might take the cake for how much I’ve learned in such a short amount of time, it’s time we talk about how much a relationship with your trainer is really the foundation for becoming an all-around solid rider.
The countless hours you and your trainer spend together are priceless. The countless hours you two spend together in that ring while she’s yelling at you from the center for more leg, and you’re sweating, and you can’t breathe, and you want to scream at her because damnit, you’re trying, and you feel like nothing’s working…they matter the most. You spend countless hours in that saddle listening to her every word as she carefully watches your body, your horse, and everything in between, picking apart what you need to fix like a broken record. Did she just tell you to repeat that line for the third time because you still didn’t get the right amount of impulsion? Yup, you bet she did, and she’ll tell you to do it again if you don’t fix that crap you’re pulling out there. The laps she makes you post stirrup-less make you question why you chose this sport. Everything hurts. There's sweat dripping down your back. Why couldn’t you have liked video games instead?
She sees you at your worst. She knows when you get in that saddle and your head’s not in the game. She gives you nothing but tough love, because she wants the best for you. There’s no sugar coating in this sport. There’s no “That’s okay, you tried.” No. Your trainer will push and push and push until you’re on the verge of passing out. Your trainer will make you work on what you hate the most because it’s your weakness and she knows you need to improve on it. She’s there with you at 4:30 a.m. on show days, from loading the trailer with you while you two are barely awake until 3:00 p.m. when you’re warming up in the 90 degree weather. After that, she’s on the side of the show ring yelling orders at you left and right to sit deep or give more leg, all because she wants you to bring on the A game she knows you have. She’s there when your horse decides “not today” before an oxer and throws you over it. Some days, you want to give up — but she’s there to convince you that’s not the answer.
She’s there with you when you finally get rid of that bad habit you had engrained into your equitation for years. She’s there with you when the light bulb above your head goes off and you finally get it. She’s there with you when they announce your name as the Grand Champion of your division. She’s there to embrace you with a congratulations because she knew you could do it. She’s there with you because you make her proud.
Horseback riding is one of the toughest, most dangerous sports out there, yet we continue to do it day after day because nothing can keep us away from it. We continue to love it more than we did yesterday because our trainers have given us the self-confidence and encouragement we needed all along. To every trainer out there who dedicates his or her life to teaching your students with every ounce of passion you have, day in and day out — thank you. Thank you for always giving us your best. Thank you for always showing us what we’re truly capable of, despite what we believe about ourselves. Thank you for catching our runaway horses for us after we face plant into the dirt. Thank you for seeing our personal weaknesses and knowing exactly what to do to help us improve them. Thank you for not only being our coaches, but for being our friends. We are riders on our own, but without you, our sport and our passion cease to exist. Thank you.