Ever since I was a little girl, I have always dreamed about the characteristics I wanted my future husband to have. It wasn't until I got older, much older, that I started thinking about the woman that would capture the heart of one of the most important men in my life. Now that you've come along, there are some things I want you to know.

He's a fragile soul.

My brother was the first person I knew in my family. We've been through so much together. Although everyone has their own struggles, and most of the time I want to strangle his neck for being so stupid, there's no doubt that he's had to endure more. He was neglected as an infant by biological parents. Although the biological mother did what she could despite the abusive alcoholic father, he was still cut short from the most important Trust vs Mistrust stage in development. Because of that, it's hard for him to trust that people really want the best for him. Therefore, he hates constructive criticism. He hates being told that what he's doing is wrong, even if you say it in the nicest most loving way possible. If you ever want to get through to him, I suggest telling him anyways but showing that you still love him and support him. Sometimes you have no choice but to show him tough love, and that's okay.

He has a temper.

The expression of anger is learned, therefore, it can be unlearned. What he needs is a gentle soul in his life, one that won't blow up with rage when she becomes angry as well. Two hot-headed people will never work out, trust me. I lived with the guy for like 17 years of my life and never have I ever wanted to unleash a million spiders in someone's bed as much as I wanted to with him. So be kind when y'all argue, but make sure he knows that you won't tolerate being walked on or disrespected.

I'm not here to scare you off, but I am protective of him.

Like I said, we've been there since day one together. I hope that you and I can be friends, but in order for that to happen you have to respect me and my relationship with my brother. I will always have his back over yours. If I can see that he's making a terrible mistake by marrying you, I will tell him and I won't hold back. So far, I've been right about every girl he's ever dated. So I hope that you're a clean, decent girl that has ambitions of your own. My brother is not your piggy bank. If he deserves to hand over money to anyone, it's me. Because he has eaten all my food all my life. That booger. And if you cheat on him, just know that there's a crazy side to me that you don't want to see.

He loves to eat.

This one is one of the most important points that I will point out to you. I like to refer to him as "The Human Garbage Disposal." He will eat anything. His favorite dessert is Chocolate Delight, especially Mama's recipe. Maybe she'll give it to you. So be prepared to grocery shop a lot with him in the house.

You better respect our mother.

Even though you will have no reason not to, you better respect her regardless. I'm not asking you to, I'm telling you to. Our mother is the kindest woman you will ever meet. She loves her baby boy more than anything, besides Daddy and me of course. If you are not good to him, then you won't be good enough for her. And no, those prom pictures of my brother and his ex-girlfriend will not be coming down off the wall. Get over it.

Drag his butt to church.

Even if he doesn't want to go, make him anyways. A relationship built on the foundation of God is important. He needs a woman who will encourage him to challenge his walk with God every day. Be the helper God made you to be, and help him be the leader God made him to be. He's a much nicer man when God is his priority.

He loves Jim Carrey.

You can try and form a bond over the mutual love of Jim Carrey like he and I have, but I honestly doubt you'll succeed. Whenever he's being a grouchy little turd, just pop in an Ace Ventura movie and he should be good to go. And if you can't stand Ace Ventura, then the marriage might not work out. Sorry.

Through everything, I just want my brother to be happy. I want him to find a woman, not a girl, that will absolutely love him through everything. There will always be a part of me that will feel like you're stealing him away from me. There will always be a part of me that will be jealous because I'll no longer have those late movie nights with him, and you will. I'm glad that he's finally found someone that he could see his self with for the rest of his life, and one that will put up with him. I do hope for the best of yall's future, and welcome to the family.