To my best friend,

You came over last week crying harder than I have ever seen you cry. I could barely ask "What happened?" before you dissolved into a puddle of tears on my couch. So there we sat, in my room illuminated by Christmas lights, and you cried. I didn't know what to say, and you didn't know what you needed to hear. We would stray from the topic for a while, but before long you were back in tears remembering something that won't ever be the same. And then you left, and there were a billion things I wanted to say

My dear, I know it hurts. And it will for a while. You're going to cry, and scream, and be afraid. And it's not going to be easy. He's gone, and he was a part of your life--a part of your plans. You're probably feeling hurt, and lonely, and a million others things that I can't even guess at, but whatever they are, they're valid. However you're feeling, and whatever you're doing to cope, is valid. People aren't going to get it. Your parents aren't going to understand everything. I'm not even going to understand a lot of it, but it is valid. So do what you need to do. Lock yourself in your house for a week. Fight with your brother if it makes you feel better. Call me at 3 a.m. asking me why boys suck. Do what you have to, but whatever you do, don't pretend to be OK.

You aren't going to wake up tomorrow morning and everything be fine. Tomorrow it's still going to hurt, and you're still going to cry. And it'll hurt the day after that, and the day after that, and the day after that, and then eventually you're going to wake up and it's going to hurt a little less. And every day you wake up it will stop hurting little by little until one day you will wake up and he won't be the first thought that pops into your head. He wasn't forever and neither is this pain

As much as this hurts right now remember that better things are ahead. One day you're going to find a boy that turns your world upside down and makes you question why this ever hurt so bad. But before that happens remember that your life is still going. There are still pretty sunsets, cute dogs, books to read, television shows to watch, and late night conversations to be had. If he's meant to be in your life he'll come back around. If he isn't then something new and better is on the horizon. Being with him was fun and exciting. Being his girlfriend was familiar. The next time you see him remember this.The next time you see him thank him for stopping by and ask him to leave the door open behind him.

And more than anything else, I ask that you remember this: you are and always have been more than his girlfriend. Before being his girlfriend, or ex-girlfriend, you are exactly that, you. You are the girl who re-reads books three times just because she knows the ending. The girl who squeals at babies in the grocery store. The girl who blows up my phone at 1 a.m. because she remembers how excited she is to be a wife one day. You are a daughter, a student, a sister, and a friend. You are so many things other than his ex-girlfriend. You are you, flaws, tears, and all.

Forever Yours,

The best friend who didn't know what to say