'To Love Someone' By Ben Abraham

'To Love Someone' By Ben Abraham

People have always told me your college years are about "finding yourself." And it's not as pretty as they make it out to be.


I am the type of person that connects music to emotions, and emotions to experiences or time periods of my life. Whether positive or negative, whenever a song comes on the radio or appears on my shuffled Spotify, I am reminded of that emotion and the experience that accompanies it. While learning about new artists is always fun, sometimes reminiscing on songs and artists I used to love is just as exciting. Just this last week I rediscovered a favorite song from my freshman year at Emory: "To Love Someone" by Ben Abraham.

I started listening to this song in the blistering cold, walking down the hill from the Burlington Road Music Building. I was questioning my decision to be a music major; I was questioning my decision to be at Emory; I was questioning everything. Freshman year was a meaningful year for me. Despite the big change of moving to Atlanta, I learned a lot about myself and what I need in my life to be happy. "To Love Someone" brought me a lot of peace in a time when it seemed like all the decisions I was making weren't right for me.

Now, listening to this song as a sophomore, it means less to me about decisions and more about my identity. I know this is getting cheesy fast so bear with me. People have always told me your college years are about "finding yourself." I always brushed that aside with a "yeah, yeah I know" but it's true. And it's not as pretty as they make it out to be. In the midst of choosing a major, career path, sorority to join etc., you simultaneously discover what to prioritize and who are the most important people in your life. It is daunting at first and frustrating (at least it is for me) because there is no clear answer.

One of my favorite lyrics from Ben Abraham's song is: "And lately I've begun to find that home is harder to define, I'll take my dwelling for a time inside a lonely song." Leaving Dallas has not made it feel any less like home but it taught me what it feels like to "come home." Whenever I left places in the past, it was almost always permanently. We would go back and visit but it wasn't to our old house and it most certainly didn't feel like it used to. Dallas still feels like home but slowly but surely Atlanta is beginning to as well. That thought makes me uncomfortable because it is an indicator that I am moving on.

"Some will say you need to find the common men who share your mind, where others say to hide yourself, protect your heart above all else." Strangely, I think have done both of these things during my short time at Emory. I have found friends who are more like-minded and passionate about issues and interests I care about here than I have anywhere else. I have always thought that standing up for what you believe in is important but it is much easier when you have other people willing to stand with you. At the same time, I have learned the importance of protecting your heart.

Unfortunately, sometimes that comes with hiding parts of yourself in order to not get hurt. Every time I walked back from music during my freshman year, I felt like I was hiding something. I loved music but I hated studying it in an academic environment. For some reason, it felt like I was betraying the gift I was given.

People will always tell you that you cannot begin to love someone else until you love yourself. I think a big part of "finding yourself" in college is this difficult process of loving who you are growing up to be. But as Ben Abraham says "to love someone, when you love someone, that's where you belong." Maybe this isn't the interpretation Ben was hoping for, but I think once you learn to love yourself and all that encompasses your identity, that's when you will finally feel like you belong.

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10 Ways To Be The Girl Every Guy Wants

A comprehensive do-it-yourself guide to being the girl every guy wants.

1. Smile all the time.

Guys want to be with girls who are always happy. Men get severely uncomfortable when all the women around them are not Cheshire cat level elated all the fucking time. Why are you mad? Why do you look so pissed? Are you defective? Autopilot your brain to borderline creepy giddiness before men get the idea that you might actually be capable of a full range of human emotion.

2. Be smart.

Men want women to be smart, but never smarter than them. Don’t know or say anything too much about anything specifically – except sports.

3. Eat like a man, look like a lady.

How many burgers can you fit in your mouth at once? Better, even, how many hotdogs? Have the appetite of a grizzly bear, but eat like a cute tiny rabbit, or Kate Upton faking an orgasm. Oh, and never, ever get above a size 4.

4. Play video games.

No guy can resist a girl who loves to play video games (in her underwear). Fifa, 2K, Smash, Kart – know them all. If you can’t at least beat his worst friend at his favorite game, you’re not a keeper.

5. Love beer.

If you can’t throw ‘em back like one of the guys, you’re not wifey. Yeah, that Norwegian IPA no one's ever fucking heard of? You got it. Bud Light? Sure. Fat Tire? You love that shit. Feel free to let out that beer burp while you’re at it, but the burp you’d imagine a Japanese dwarf squirrel would let out after eating rainbows. Oh, and don’t forget, size 4.

6. Be a freak, but also a nun.

We all know that lyric (thank you, Ludacris, so much). Hit those yoga poses hard because he wants you to bust that shit out like you’ve done it before. But you haven’t … right? Have you?!

7. Keep him on his toes.

No man wants a woman who is predictable and boring. Challenge him. Keep him intrigued. Drop an F bomb every now and then. Learn a foreign language in your spare time so that you might give the illusion of being exotic in bed (Slavic languages sound super sexy). Induce yourself into an epileptic seizure. Whatever it takes to keep it interesting.

8. Have quirks.

Ah, quirks. The things that make people unique. The things that make people, people. You must have at least three of these but no more than five. Think relatable Stepford Wife.

9. Be hot.

This is potentially the most important, and luckily I don’t need to tell you how this works. Look at anything. Anywhere. That ever existed.

10. Never, ever get mad.

The worst thing you can do as a woman is challenge a man’s authority. Don’t talk back. Don’t think. Don’t have expectations. Sit. Roll over. Hold the bark.


And finally, in the spirit of strong conclusions and remarkably appropriate GIFs:

Cover Image Credit: Tumblr

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15 Thing Only Early 2000's Kids Will Understand

"Get connected for free, with education connection"


This is it early 2000's babies, a compilation finally made for you. This list is loaded with things that will make you swoon with nostalgia.

1. Not being accepted by the late 90's kids.


Contrary to what one may think, late 90's and early 00's kids had the same childhood, but whenever a 00's kid says they remember something on an "only 90's kids will understand" post they are ridiculed.

2. Fortune tellers.


Every day in elementary school you would whip one of these bad boys out of your desk, and proceed to tell all of your classmates what lifestyle they were going to live and who they were going to marry.



You could never read this book past 8 o'clock at night out of fear that your beloved pet rabbit would come after you.

4. Silly bands.


You vividly remember begging your parents to buy you $10 worth of cheap rubber bands that vaguely resembles the shape of an everyday object.

5. Parachutes.


The joy and excitement that washed over you whenever you saw the gym teacher pull out the huge rainbow parachute. The adrenaline that pumped through your veins whenever your gym teacher tells you the pull the chute under you and sit to make a huge "fort".

6. Putty Erasers


You always bought one whenever there was a school store.

7. iPod shuffle.


The smallest, least technological iPpd apple has made, made you the coolest kid at the bus stop.

8. "Education Connection"

You knew EVERY wood to the "Education Connection" commercials. Every. Single.Word.

9. " The Naked Brothers Band"


The "Naked Brothers Band" had a short run on Nickelodeon and wrote some absolute bangers including, "Crazy Car' and "I Don't Wanna Go To School"

10. Dance Dance Revolution


This one video game caused so many sibling, friend, and parent rivalries. This is also where you learned all of your super sick dance moves.

11. Tamagotchi


Going to school with fear of your Tamagotchi dying while you were away was your biggest worry.

12. Gym Scooters


You, or somebody you know most likely broke or jammed their finger on one of these bad boys, but it was worth it.

13. Scholastic book fairs


Begging your parents for money to buy a new book, and then actually spending it on pens, pencils, erasers, and posters.



Who knew that putting yogurt in a plastic tube made it taste so much better?

15. Slap Bracelets


Your school probably banned these for being "too dangerous".

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