I know how you are feeling right now. You feel hopeless, angry, sad, fearful, shocked, heartbroken, drained, useless, unloved, forgotten, scared and lost. You don't know what to do. He has left you. He being your rock, your friend, your father. You have lost your Rose. She is your guardian angel now. Your peers are talking badly about you. They are calling you trash, not good enough, stupid, fat, ugly, and worthless.

Thoughts are running through your head at 130 miles per hour. Tears are streaming down your face. Your eyes are bloodshot. Your body can't stop shaking. Your heart is beating a mile a minute. Your blood is boiling. Your head is beginning to hurt. All you see is darkness. All you feel is pain. You are begging for the suffering to end. You can't take the sorrow and hatred you feel for someone you have spent your whole life loving.

You've entered into darkness and can't seem to get out. Something keeps pulling you in deeper and deeper. Voices in your mind keep telling you horrible things. You can't feel anything but the pain is still there. You can't see anything but the hatred is still there. You close your eyes and let your mind give into the pain. You have lost control.

You open your eyes and see the ground far from your feet that are dangling. You're sitting on the ledge of your bedroom window. You think strategically about how far the fall might be. You're on the second floor of the apartment building so the fall wouldn't be too long. The escape would be quick and easy. You wouldn't have to feel the pain anymore if you happen to fall. You think about your family and the ones who you call your friends. The voices in your head say, "Would they really miss you? Would they even care?"

Tears are still streaming down your face. Your hands are clutching the sides of the window. You lean forward slightly and feel gravity take over. Your heart is racing more than it was before. Your body is trembling. The voices are saying, "Do it. Stop the pain." You move more forward again and begin to slip from the window.

You open your eyes and somehow you are back in your room.

Safe.

I know how you feel because I am you. Let me tell you that you're smart, strong and loved. Don't ever forget that. You have people who will be there no matter what you go through. You don't need him. You don't need those people from elementary school talking badly about you. You have your guardian angel taking care of you from above.

You have not lost your world. Right now, you might think you have but trust me you haven't. You are going to achieve so much. You're going to meet five girls in high school who are going to be your soulmates for life. You're going to graduate from high school. You're going to be attending college. You're going to join a sorority and gain 39 sisters. You're going to be taking steps closer and closer to your dream. You are going to be happy. I am happy.

To: Little Kristen

From: Kristen