50 Things I'd Rather Do Than Go On The Titanic II
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50 Things I'd Rather Do Than Step Foot On The 'Titanic II' In 2020

Leonardo DiCaprio ain't on this boat.

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50 Things I'd Rather Do Than Step Foot On The 'Titanic II' In 2020
20th Century Fox

The Titanic II is taking the same course as they did in 1912 but in 2020.

I knew they would most likely do this years later, but can't believe they are taking the same voyage that killed over 1,500 people. Hopefully, times have changed and technology will make this successful. (Yet you won't find me anywhere near that boat.)

Here are 50 things I'd rather do than step foot on that boat and drown in a sinking ship by an iceberg.

Date Leonardo DiCaprio

He taught me how bad an idea going on this boat would be, after all

Swim head-on into an iceberg myself.

It's safer this way since I won't be swimming fast enough to cause myself damage.

Being in the shower when the fire alarm goes off 

Let's just pray I bring a towel or robe with me.

Going to an 8 am lecture 

8 am lectures just shouldn't exist, but I'd rather go than go down with the Titanic II.

Having no heat for the month 

I'll just snuggle up with five layers and my cat. I'll be okay.

Living in a triple when made for a double 

We will just stack some things but it will be okay. We will make it work.

Be the gifts under the chairs at the Oprah Show

HERE I AM WORLD!!

Be hit in the head with a golf ball at a professional golfing tournament 

I mean the woman who got hit in the eye only almost became blind. I can live with that!

Taking a baseball bat to both knee caps 

I've had five knee surgeries, one more can't hurt.

Be mauled by a bear 

Less than three people a year die from a bear attack. I should be okay and hopefully not one of the three.

Have a piano fall on me 

I have lived a good life. Being squished by a piano is a dream way to die.

Run a zoo by myself 

Matt Damon made is seem like buying a zoo is the best thing you can do for yourself!

Go to a wrestling match 

I watch Total Bellas so I feel somewhat prepared for this experience.

See an 80 year old man in a speedo 

I probably could honestly see worse things in life.

Seeing my dad hit a juul or a vape pen 

Hopefully it will be a decent flavor and smell.

Drive for Uber 

I currently don't have my permit but I mean, fake it till we make it, right?

Go to a New York Yankees game 

I'm from Maine and we watch the Red Sox up here. Maybe they will give me a warm welcome.

Meet Donald Trump and help with his tan 

That man needs some help and no one will step up and help a man out. I'll take one for the team, you're welcome.

Go into a haunted house with no way out

I love spooky things but hate things jumping out and chasing me. Maybe I'll make friends and find a job?

Fall off a cliff 

How bad could it be smashing into rocks and trees?

Wake up during surgery 

People wake up in surgery all the time on tv, how bad could it be?

Stay on the phone with a telemarketer 

I'd love to hear about her children and her new pet rat Rootie that pays rent in the basement.

See how many marshmallows I can fit in my mouth 

Maybe only two but that's two more than a baby could do.

Accidentally like a picture from a year ago while on instagram 

This is so embarrassing but we all have to live through the shame of social media stalking at some point in their life.

Wearing Crocs for the rest of my life 

I hate crocs with a burning passion but for you, I will.

Get hit by a biker on campus 

Everyday I almost get hit by a biker on campus, so I might as well do the job for them and step in front of them.

Fall down a flight of stairs 

I do this maybe once a year, but why not do it more?

Fart loudly during a test in a lecture hall 

This is my biggest fear but so is dying on the Titanic.

Be married to a serial killer 

1% of murderers are serial killers so why not be married to that 1%?

Change a leaking poopy diaper 

I'm a aunt of three nephews and this is honestly the worst thing. Kudos to you moms and dads.

Eat meatloaf from two weeks ago 

Meatloaf is so good but probably two weeks old meatloaf is not. (i'll keep you posted.)

Wear a cat tail every day 

People who wear tails kind of freak me out because I hate things hanging from my butt. But(t) here we go!

Wear lipstick like Miranda Sings everyday 

I would just love that red stain from the lipstick all over my face.

Have a mustache tattooed on my face 

I'd rather have Stalin's mustache than Hitler's it would go better with my round face.

Die on Grey's Anatomy 

My mom always tells people to not go to the Grey's hospital or you'll die. Here I go!

Never eat pizza again 

Once a week I crave pizza and order Pat's Pizza. It's been real, Pat's.

Take shots of honey mustard 

I hate honey mustard but I'm good at shots.

Be the basketball during a Celtics game 

Being a basketball is probably the best job in the world. I'm round and am used to being thrown around. Bring it on.

Go streaking during a hockey game 

I've been streaking before but I do love hockey!

Never escape an escape room 

I wonder how anxious this would make me?

Watch the movie Titanic for a week straight 

The Titanic is such a long movie and I always fall asleep but a week straight can't be that bad!

Tweet for Donald Trump 

Maybe I'll tweet a few nice things! Nice shoes!

Get my nipples pierced 

Ouch.

Listen to someone chew with their mouths opened 

Listening to people chew loudly makes me nauseous. Please bring me a bucket with my water.

Allow an otter to live in my bath tub rent free 

Otter, you're welcome.

Not being able to eat the Marshmallows in my Lucky Charms 

The marshmallows are my favorite part.

Watch my cat hunt a live turkey in my yard 

My cat is probably 17 pounds and I'd love to see him hunt a wild turkey.

Be snowed in with no cellphone 

No live tweet updates, you're welcome.

Go to work in full drag 

At least I know some drag queens who can help a sister out!

Live in Hill House 

I'm going to have to put that Poppy in her place!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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