Tips From A Couple Celebrating 62 Years
Relationships

Tips From A Couple Celebrating 62 Years

They must be doing something right.

7
Mackenzie Hill

As college students, we have so much going on in our day to day lives that starting and maintain relationships can be hectic. While dealing with class, work, homework, hobbies, and the occasional free time, it feels almost impossible to dedicate time to intimate relationships. Relationships are complicated on their own, let alone while also dealing with the chaos of day-to-day life. So how do we make them work?

On June 1, my grandparents celebrated 62 years of marriage. They met when they were 15 and 17, and haven't looked at another person since. While times have changed and members of our generation and those below us are marrying older and older, the secrets to keeping a relationship happy are still valid, and are ideas that we seek in carrying on our own interactions. Because I so admire the longevity of their love and happiness, I sought out just a few tips provided by my grandparents in hopes of understanding what it takes to make it work.

1. Find commonalities that you can share together on a daily basis.

2. You are two “individuals” vowing to make your lives into one and just as you may have conflict within your own mind about things you do, there are now two of you who will sometimes be in disagreement as to how things work.

3. Learn to wait and listen. You do not always have to be “right.”

4. Be “thick-skinned” and be slow to defend yourself or react. Words spoken cannot be unspoken. Breathe and know that your partner will both challenge (push your buttons) and support you (be your greatest fan).

5. Have a little secret “I-love-you” signal. Say those three little words often, even if you don’t feel just super wonderful when you say them.

6. Write little “love” notes at appropriate times and sometimes ‘just because.’ Be thoughtful.

7. Kiss and wave good-bye when parting and watch as your partner drives away or until out of sight.

8. Remember the common courtesies and simple acts of kindness (a sweet touch, wink, smile of support).

9. Find humor in what could be taken as criticisms. Laugh a lot together.

10. Say a heartfelt “Thank You” for the small and big things.

11. Help each other in the “chores” and ‘projects’ that may not be that pleasant.

12. Be courteous AND cautious upon “re-entry” after being apart in a workday or errand. That is to say, don’t just “blurt out” the relief you feel or expose ill feelings toward events or circumstances that have occurred. It may be that your partner has had even more traumatic or dramatic things occur during the day. In other words, give each other time to “sense” what has happened and seek to “merge” gently to catch up on the occurrences since you were last together. It is very likely that each of you had a ‘hard’ and challenging day or perceive that you have. And chances are that each of you want the same thing from the other: kindness, understanding and maybe a little pampering. Give that to each other. And remember, it is not a competition to see who had the most challenging day or hardest day.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Taylar Banks

May 25, 2020: the day that will forever be remembered as the day George Floyd lost his life at the hands of cops.

The day that systematic racism again reared its head at full force in 2020.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

These 17 Black-Owned Businesses Ship Baked Goods, Rosé, And Even Fried Chicken Nationwide

Eat your way through this country's greatest food — from your couch.

Call it the easily bored Gemini in me, but I'm constantly looking for new food to try. Usually, travel quenches my taste for new and exciting cuisines, but given the fact that international travel is not always a possibility, I've begun exploring alternatives.

In the interest of wanting to support the Black community and Black-owned businesses, and also wanting to try some of the country's greatest food without having to get off my couch, I started off (pessimistically) doing research, only to find that the options were vast.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

24 Beauty And Style Brands Donating To The Fight To End Police Brutality Against Black People

From small, boutique brands to legacy fashion brands.

The worlds of beauty and fashion often collide, whether for good or bad. In both, underrepresentation has always been, and remains to be, a major unresolved issue. After the recent killing of George Floyd, many people are rightfully enraged, compounded by the fact his death in police custody wasn't an isolated incident.

Police brutality against Black people is not new, and isn't going away till we start dedicating resources to fighting it. Many of us, as individuals, have only begun in the last week scratching the surface of what it means to educate ourselves on race, historical race relations, and how to be an ally to the Black community.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Feel A Lil' Better: Because You Can Still Connect While Disconnecting From Social Media

Your weekly wellness boost from Odyssey.

No matter how good (or bad) you'd describe your health, one thing is for sure: a little boost is ALWAYS a good idea. Whether that's reading a new, motivating book, or listening to a song that speaks to your soul, there are plenty of resources to help your health thrive on any given day.

I don't know if you've heard, but there's a lot going on right now, particularly in relation to George Floyd's death, Black Lives Matter, and public protest of racial injustice in the United States. While we can all agree that this deserves conversations, change, and actionable good, social media arguments with Great Aunt Linda are not where social change begins and ends. Spending too much time scrolling through your phone has never been healthy, but now it's even more addicting — what does that one person from my hometown say about this? How can I further education within discussions? Am I posting enough?

Keep Reading... Show less

I don't know about you, but reading is at the top of my to-do list this summer... especially with all the social distancing I'll still be doing. If, like me, you're hoping to pick up a romantic page-turner (or a couple dozen), here are 23 romance novels by Black authors you'll absolutely LOVE reading.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

22 Black-Owned Etsy Shops With The Perfect Gifts For Everyone In Your Life — Including You

Treat yourself and your loved ones while supporting Black creatives and artisans.

R-KI-TEKT, Pontie Wax, Lovely Earthlings, and blade + bloom on Etsy

The world is taking action against the injustices and under-representation plaguing Black lives, and one small but impactful thing you can do to actively make a difference is support Black-owned businesses.

Etsy is likely one of your go-to sites for gift-buying, but have you ever paid attention to which independent artists and sellers you're buying from?

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

True Self-Care Is HARD, That Face Mask Isn't Actually Going To Solve Your Problems

There's a line between self-care and self-destruction.

Anyone who hasn't been living under a rock for the past few years has seen something somewhere about self-care whether it was on Facebook, Twitter, or their Instagram feed. Oftentimes it's pictures of celebrities or influencers sipping green smoothies or slathering on mud masks with #selfcare. It's posts like these that made me realize that "self-care" has become the ultimate buzz word, soaring in popularity but in the process, it's lost most of its original meaning. It's time to set the record straight and reclaim the term.

Although self-care has been around for quite some time, within the past few years it's been misconstrued and commodified as our capitalist society tends to do with things it thinks can be profited off. Self-care is now being peddled as something that can be bought and sold on the shelf at Target rather than something that takes real work to achieve. This fake self-care movement is not only enabling people to over-indulge themselves, but it has created a crutch for people to avoid the responsibility of taking true care of themselves. Instead of doing the work that needs to be done, many people fall into the trap of rewarding themselves for doing nothing at all — this can quickly become an unhealthy coping mechanism, especially with corporations cheering us on (to buy their next product). Long, hard day at work? Just grab your third iced coffee of the day! Fight with your SO? Buy that 50-dollar face mask, it'll make you feel better! This is how self-care becomes self-sabotage and self-destructive.

Keep Reading... Show less

Minorities are consistently under-represented in our day-to-day lives, notably in the world of fashion. It's likely you're looking for a way to support black artists. Whether that's the case or you're just a fashion-lover in general, these brands aren't just some of the best black-owned fashion brands — they're some of the most innovative brands of our time, period.

From luxury staples to fun accessories and loungewear, these brands aren't just stunning names you should definitely be following on Instagram, each honors the founder's roots in unique ways with the power of storytelling through artistic expression that manifests in pieces we can't wait to wear.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments