To those who feel like they’re at rock bottom,
I could start this off and say “it gets better” but I’m sure by now you’ve heard that more than you care to admit. I could say, “you’ll get over it, it’s only a phase” but I know that that’s easier said than done. I could say how this will “only make you stronger” but that’s not what you want to hear right now. I’ve been there.
More than anything else, you just want to know that you are at a turnaround point in your life and that things won’t get worse. You just want some good news. But after so much disappointment, it can be hard to feel like anything will go your way. You’ll question yourself and your actions more than ever before. But in order to get to this turnaround, it’s important to realize that the change starts with you.
People say it’s lonely at the top, but I’d argue it’s so much lonelier at the bottom. Which is why it’s important to let people in. You don’t have to struggle alone. It’s easier to not pity yourself when others don’t pity you either, so open up to someone you trust. Someone has been through what you are going through. Someone can relate.
It’s cliché, I’m sure, to say that you have nothing to lose, but in a way it’s true. Life is full of hardships and you just experienced one. But what’s more, you just survived one. Now I’m sure you didn’t go unscathed, but you’re still here. You’re stronger than you may feel right now.
While it may not seem possible to be happy at a time like this, a great place to start is to take a step back and appreciate what you feel you do have. Happiness can be found in the small things. For me, it was getting coffee. Happiness can also be found when you appreciate yourself and all that you do (which is more than you will even realize).
We can’t expect ourselves to be perfect. These high expectations will only cause us to feel inadequate for much longer. In a society that constantly pushes being the best, this can be hard. I’m not saying to lower your standards, I’m just saying you’ll be happier if you take things as they come and don’t have incredibly high expectations.
Being at rock bottom feels like the end of the world, but it’s really just the end of your fall. It’s the moment when you can stand back up on your feet and move forward with your life. There’s no set way to go about and do this, so find a way that works for you. You’ve got this.
Sincerely,
The girl who was once there