I’m not usually one to complain constantly (like that one friend we all have), but you know sometimes it’s nice to blow off some steam every once in a while.
There comes a point when that obnoxious dude at the table next to you deserves more than that ever-so-subtle glare after he has been crunching his plastic bottle for LITERALLY THE LAST 45 MINUTES. You all know what I’m talking about. Let’s be real.
So, instead of imagining the scenario upon which you take revenge against that one pesky person and the various ways you could snatch that water bottle and politely chuck it into the nearest recycling bin (because you’re classy af), let’s reminisce on all those times you held it in and complained quietly to yourself.
1. That one person with the 456 second Snapchat story. I mean is that really necessary? Unless you’re Beyonce, WE DO NOT CARE.
2. Timed selfies. I thought we left those back in the seventh grade. Along with the peace sign.
3. Drivers who slow down for the red light a good mile back and slooooooowly inch their way forward.
4. OH, drivers who just don’t know how to drive. That could be its own beautiful list of annoyances.
5. When you’re in a quiet space, or hey, I dunno, a library, and someone insists on having their keyboard noises turned on as they text everyone they know and their dogs.
6. Professors who set up weekly quizzes just to “keep you on your toes." No, prof, I actually am not down for that.
7. The moment you realize that your procrastination has gotten you this far, buuuut you must endure that all-nighter you have so beautifully been avoiding the past two weeks (like the test I have to study for once I am done with this).
8. Drag rats.
9. Taxi cabs in Austin, Texas. Specifically those near campus and downtown. Can’t believe we’ve made it this far without us all having one big slumber party on Sixth.
10. Your roommate insisting on pressing the snooze button probably 12 times before finally arising from bed for their 8 a.m. which you purposefully chose to avoid on your schedule. (Secret: I AM that roommate. Sry.)
This is the part where I tell you to look on the bright side and just ignore those little annoyances. But I’m gonna tell you something a little different. For the most part, the things that annoy you most, are usually the things you do also. Like snoring for example. I guarantee you sound like an asthmatic hibernating cub also. So maybe don’t steal that plastic water bottle from that obnoxious dude next to you, but suck it up and take life as it’s thrown at cha.
