Disney movies are typically based on fables. Other than telling a fun story about princesses and magic, fables also serve to teach a story. There are the typical lessons like “just be yourself” and “be kind to everyone.” But, I learned a few other things from our beloved Disney Princesses.

1. Snow White

Snow White taught me to never trust old ladies with apples. Or fruit in general. But if you do happen to take a bit of some fruit that you got from a stranger, don’t worry. Because even though you could possibly die, your true love is going to come and bring you back to life with a kiss.

2. Cinderella

Cinderella taught me that all you have to do to get a man is just leave your shoes at his house. Even though you spent the entire night together, he won’t remember your name (or what you look like) and spend the whole next day trying to bring your shoes back to you.

3. Sleeping Beauty

Aurora taught me that if you go into a coma, you just have to hope some prince comes along to kiss you awake again. (Isn’t kind of creepy that the plot of, not one, but two princess movies revolves around princes kissing sleeping women?)

4. The Little Mermaid

Ariel taught me that if you have the choice between being a mermaid or a human, always choose mermaid. But really, what was she thinking? Sure, she got the man, but who doesn’t wish they were a mermaid? She had no idea how good she had it.

5. Beauty and the Beast

Belle taught me to never go into the woods. Seriously, any time someone goes into the woods in that movie, they get attacked.

6. "Aladdin"

Jasmine basically gave me extremely unrealistic hair expectations. I always dreamed my hair would be a thick and beautiful as hers, but soon realized it wasn’t happening. Also: tigers make really cool pets.

7. "Pocahontas"

Pocahontas taught me that if a guy tries to shoot you, don’t worry, he’s the love of your life. Once the mist clears and he can see exactly how beautiful you are, he’ll immediately fall in love and forget everything he was actually there to do.

8. "Mulan"

Mulan taught me that you should never send a man to do a woman’s job. China totally would have been taken over by the Huns if Mulan hadn’t stepped in and blown up a mountain.

9. "The Princess and the Frog"

Tiana taught me that kissing a frog sometimes turns out okay. It might be gross at first, but there’s a small chance he could be a prince.

10. "Tangled"

Rapunzel taught me that frying pans are your best friend. Not only can you cook a mean pancake, but you can also use it to defend yourself from men who sneak into your house and try to cut your hair.

11. "Brave"

Merida taught me that if your mother ever makes you mad, just try to make up with her. Because if you try to turn her into a bear, it may not work out exactly how you hoped.

12. "Frozen"

Anna taught me that you shouldn’t get engaged to a guy after the first date. It’s probably a good idea that you get to know each other first.

Elsa taught me that you don’t need a man to be happy. She also taught me that music fixes everything, all of your problems go away in the amount of time it take you to sing one song.