13 Things Only Lifeguards Understand
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13 Things Only Lifeguards Understand

"Our team is the elite of the elite" - Mitch, Baywatch

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McKenna Colgan

I love being a lifeguard - but there are some things that we are the only ones who understand.

1. "WALKKKKKKKK"

They just never listen except after they get yelled at or actually fall on the pool deck and need first aid.

2. Time to go means TIME TO GET OUT OF THE POOL

When lifeguards blow the whistle and tell you to get out because either they are on break or the pool is closed, it doesn't mean go off the high dive again, or go off the rope swing, or jump back in - it means get out.

3. In-services are a nightmare

In-services are when lifeguards have to prove that they are still up to date on their life-saving skills, requiring a 300 swim, a 10-pound brick saving test, 2-minute tread, and then going through all of the life-saving scenarios and hoping to successfully pass each one. Sometimes it's once every two weeks, once a week, or maybe each day depending on who you work for. It is really annoying when you forget you have one and realize you have to do a full workout.

4. Lifeguards love the water and hate the water. 

We spend every single day at the pool. Every morning we have to wake up and put on a soaking wet suit and jump into cold water at 9 am. That's not exactly ideal. Lifeguards love the pool and it's their home but that doesn't mean we want to be sopping wet for 12 hours a day. And for fun, lifeguards love to have pushing wars and often times the person who pushes goes down with them.

5. When people try and talk to you in the chair

I don't mean to be rude, but we are supposed to be scanning the pool at all times, and having conversations are tough. People really like to come and talk to the lifeguards especially younger kids and they like to come and stand exactly where you are supposed to be watching. Seriously, I could get in trouble for this.

6. Your whistle is your best friend

The perfect whistle is out there, Fox 40. It blows perfectly gets all the kids attentions. Whistles are the perfect bff. You can twirl them around during your shift if you get bored and when you put it in your mouth and act like you might blow it - the power is real. But, if you lose your whistle, it becomes the worst day ever.

7. Kids who are playing breathing games 

Kids who play breathing games are the worst. You hate to say no to that because they really don't understand why - but's hard to know whether or not you should get in the water and save them or if they are just playin.

8. Thunder and lightning are the best

Thunder and lightning means a break for the lifeguards, so who wouldn't love that? And most families leave if a storm is coming so less people at the pool when it opens back up!

9. When kids do tricks off the diving board and you have a little panic attack

Oh yeah, don't do that no matter what your friends are trying to peer pressure you to do.

10. When something at the pool actually happens for the first time in a millennium 

11. That feeling of being a badass sitting on top of your chair

12. When a child who can't swim without a lifejacket swims without a lifejacket

Sorry, just one moment - having a panic attack.

13. When a lifeguard takes his break before you do

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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