Things Not To Say To Your Server

Things Not To Say To Your Server

Sir, you're not funny, please sit down.


My best friend worked at our local Pizza Hut for nearly 3 years, and hearing her complain about those customers and "funny" things customers do in general was as funny as it was infuriating and annoying for her. Inspired by my piece "Annoying Things Theater Workers Hear," she sent me this piece, which I added on to. Being a waitress teaches you some things and changes the way you act when you go to eat. Really, working anywhere in the food industry teaches you much more than you would expect. Please, remember that your server is a person, too. And your jokes are not original. We just laugh, nod, and smile, because we could lose our jobs for responding how we would like to.

1. "Oh, we have to pay for this? Haha."

YES. THAT'S NOT FUNNY. IF YOU DON'T PAY I HAVE TO PAY. Is my life a game to you? I get that you're joking, but seriously, it's not funny because nothing is free, otherwise we wouldn't get paid. Working for free does not pay the bills.

2. "Wow. You're a good-looking girl; can you be our waitress?"

Sir, please go somewhere else. That's so rude to me and to the other waitresses working with me. Are they not good-looking enough for you? If I wait on you are you going to continue with the rude commentary? Now no one here wants to wait on you anymore. Good job, you played yourself.

3. "This food/service was bad. No tip for you."

Ok, no one has actually said this to me, but it has happened. A table once left a coworker a note explaining why they didn't tip her. That. Is. BS. Especially when we work our butts off for you and you're mad that the kitchen is slammed and it took a few minutes to get your food out. Do you not understand that most servers make less than $3.00/hour? We live on tips. Literally. No tip means no dinner. Also, if you don't tip us, we will go tell all our coworkers about it and everyone will remember your face. Then when you come in again none of us will want to wait on you, much less give you our best service. Great. You played yourself again.

4. Me: "Sir, what's this?" Customer: "Haha, that's my piggly wiggly card! Will that not cover it?"

Yep, this really happened. Get out of here. Ok, again. NO, that is not funny. You must pay me with real life money, please. Bye. If. You. Don't. Pay. I. Pay. Even if you're just joking to see if I'd notice, you still handed me a fake card and made me run up to the register, notice something was wrong, then awkwardly confront you about it, nervously wondering if I'd still get tipped, then fake laugh at it. Please stop. You're not making my day better. It's not funny. It's not cute.

5. "There's something wrong with my food. Give me new food."

Uh. No. If there is genuinely something wrong, I'm happy to get it fixed for you. But I have literally caught customers lying so that they can get free food and then have an excuse not to tip. Again. Is my life a game to you? Don't go out to eat if you don't want to pay. Glad we have an understanding, see you never.

6. "You don't serve alcohol? I'm leaving."

Fine. I didn't want to wait on drunk people with bad attitudes anyway! Many fast food places have a staff mostly under 18, so it's illegal for us to handle alcohol. Which means our establishment doesn't serve it. Even if you bring your own, I still can't touch it. But don't bring it at all. Get over it, dude. Drink when you get home or go to a bar.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Founders Of Color Q&A: Yarlap's MaryEllen Reider On Destigmatizing Women's Health

The father-daughter duo co-founded the brand and has since generated a passionate, dedicated community of women.

MaryEllen Reider

I was lucky enough to meet MaryEllen Reider over a decade ago as a fellow freshman in college. Since then, I had the luxury of being able to witness her evolution from the faithful companion I went to my first job fair with to the woman who is now a pioneer in destigmatizing the portrayal of women's reproductive health.

Keep Reading... Show less

My favorite Editor was feeling under the weather yesterday. All I wanted was to make her a vegan iced matcha latte. With distance forbidding it, I instead decided to write up this quick, easy recipe. I made it to be vegan and organic for optimal health benefits.

Matcha green tea is made from grounded green tea leaf and it comes with the most antioxidant boost ever.

Keep Reading... Show less

This coffee brand is USDA organic. Newman's Own Keurig coffee flavors are all organic. They have French Roast, Decaf, and a Special Blend. I'm in a committed relationship with the French Roast flavor. The smell alone from dispensing 1 cup of coffee sets a whole cafe jazz vibe.

I'm already relaxed when I smell the coffee all ready for dressing. The way I make my coffee is simple and sweet, literally. I add a spoon of organic brown sugar and a splash of organic almond vanilla milk. This cup of coffee has changed my life forever. I have never been so productive in my life and I truly believe it's because the coffee is organic.

Keep Reading... Show less

These organic, cruelty-free skincare products are great for hot, sweaty summers. I use them every day, so you will find my honest opinion about them all. I highly recommend using organic products because they are least likely to be harmful to your body.

This may seem like an extra step when it comes to your beauty routine, but it's really easy. These 5 products could be the start of your next beauty venture.

Keep Reading... Show less

These 5 Black Handbag Designers Should Be On Every Accessory Lover's Radar

With the push to support more Black-owned businesses, we've put together a list of Black owned handbag designers.

Ever since the current upheaval of societal silence happening in the country caused by the #BlackLivesMatter movement, there has been a bigger push for people to support Black-owned businesses.

Granted, there are a lot fo Black-owned businesses to support, it just takes time to find them. With that being said, fashion is a sector, just like any sector really, in a culture that still has people of color calling out for more diversity.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Feel A Lil' Better: Because Therapy Dogs Aren't Just Cute, They're Working

Your weekly wellness boost from Odyssey.

No matter how good (or bad) you'd describe your health, one thing is for sure: a little boost is ALWAYS a good idea. Whether that's reading a new, motivating book, or listening to a song that speaks to your soul, there are plenty of resources to help your health thrive on any given day.

There are many different ways people overcome obstacles in their lives. Thankfully, the stigma surrounding therapy is slowly (but surely) slipping away and we're opening up about our problems and needs. For some, a good workout is just as relaxing. Others are learning how meditation can be a helpful tool in their mental health journey.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments