“Can you grab my UT lanyard from my desk?”

• Don’t you dare wear that lanyard around your neck.

“Who wants to go to Morsani and get Salsa Rico?”

• It’s Stadium. Call it Stadium.

“I’m stuck living in the Barrymore this year.”

• You’re actually in the HoJo. Barrymore who?

“So many underclassmen are living in Jenkins this year.”

• Sorry, I’ve never heard of this “Jenkins” you speak of. All I know is I live in West Kennedy.

“I wonder what’s on the menu at Ultimate Dining tonight.”

• Please stop trying to make our school sound more formal than it is. It’s just the caf.

“The old gym couldn’t have been thaaaaaat bad.”

• Oh, trust me...it was.

“Why do you have an orange Spartan ID?”

• Because I started attending UT before 2015. But don’t judge me for my headshot...I don’t actually look like that. I promise.

“What do you mean there’s an incredibly underrated and underappreciated underground deli beneath Plant Hall?”

• That’s exactly what I meant.

“What is a labretti?”

• If we’re getting technical, the Pandini’s website defines a labretti as a freshly baked, folded pizza shell filled with a fusion of flavors.

“I’m here for a sick appointment.”

• Did you schedule a health center appointment before you showed up? No? Walk out. Now.

“I’m here to pick up a package.”

• Did you get an email saying you’ve received one? No? Walk out. Now.

“What’s in a meal exchange?”

• Save your breath and read the signs at each of the food locations.

“What is this Outpost place people keep saying they miss?”

• It used to be the best bar that was walking distance from campus. It closed down over the summer and recently reopened back up as the same restaurant and bar with the same name after speculations of it opening up with a new name, but people really just go to eat and watch sports games there now. It used to be the hot spot on Tuesdays and Fridays, aka my favorite nights of the week last year. And this spring, Traditions Promotions Group will be welcoming weekly Outpost nights back...(so watch out!)

“Who is ‘Tony the Omelet Man’?”

• Only the greatest person you’ll ever meet. Go to the caf and introduce yourself; you won’t regret it.

“The hotdogs from Dairy Queen are so good!”

• Said no one...ever.