For many years, I filled my head with thoughts of "the one." That is, the one person out in the world that I was meant to be with. My perfect match. My soul mate. This same idea, ingrained in the minds of people from an extremely young age, can be incredibly anxiety-inducing. What if I don't find that one person? Or worse, what if there isn't a person out there for me? There is no such thing as "the one," for the sole reason that there is no one person who will complete you. This does not mean that you won't find someone who will complete you in all the ways you would want a partner to. But to limit the possibilities of potential, capable, suitable, perfect matches to one person is just reckless.

I believe that there are many people out in the world who could be a great match, and all for different reasons. If anything, I believe in "the ones." Just as there are many possible matches out in the world right now, there are multiple matches throughout your life. We change in so many ways throughout our life. That's why we aren't the same person as we were in middle school or high school (thankfully), and won't be the same person in another five or ten years as we are now. Who we're attracted to, what our interests are, where we see ourselves in the future, our sense of humor...all of these things develop and transform as we progress through the many stages of our lives. And as we change, what we require from a loving relationship changes as well. It's okay that someone who made us very happy at one point in time isn't necessarily who we are meant to end up with. This doesn't discount or discredit the time spent with this person, nor does it invalidate any of the feelings you felt when you were with them. But it does give hope for the future--hope that you will find someone who better fits your needs, without the added pressure of finding "the one."

There is something very appealing about believing in the idea of someone being a perfect match, and I believe in finding someone who is a perfect match for me. I haven't found this person yet, but when I do, I hope that they will be a perfect match, not the perfect match. I don't think that just one person can be this person for me. I believe in love, but I don't believe in "the one."