Last year, around my 21st birthday, I was working on a paper in a coffee shop with my longtime best friend when all of a sudden I felt dizzy. I thought it was low blood sugar since it was past lunchtime so I bought soup and a sandwich and ate them with no relief. My fingers in my left hand started to tingle and eventually numbed, it was impossible for me to concentrate, and the dizziness continued.

The episodes started as just once or twice a week and quickly escalated to once or twice a day for hours at a time. I called out of work. I missed class. I stopped going to the gym and I was terrified to drive. I lost control over my life. Whatever was happening to me wasn’t just episodes, it was chronic and I wanted answers. I wanted my life back.

I saw six medical professionals before I was properly diagnosed. I was experiencing vestibular migraines as a result of Lyme Disease.

There are many different types of migraines, more than the classic one-sided headache people usually associate with a migraine. My migraines only come with physical pain about half the time but that doesn’t mean that I’m not experiencing other symptoms. Vestibular migraines are primarily dizziness but they come with at least a dozen other symptoms; I get vertigo, limb and facial numbness, brain fog, the feeling that I am floating and that my legs are completely disconnected from my body, just to name a few.

What bothered me the most about my diagnosis was the amount of people in my life who did not understand.

If you’ve ever stared down the face of a chronic illness, you understand this better than most people. I sat across from doctors who told me again and again that it was in my head. I sat across from friends who told me that it was just stress. I sat across from professors who didn’t understand that I couldn’t drive myself to class because I couldn’t feel my legs.

Migraines are not just headaches, they are completely debilitating. They’re painful and they’re real.

There’s a lot I’ve learned since my diagnosis. Not everyone experiences pain, so pain relievers like Excedrin and Advil won’t always provide me with relief. According to the American Migraine Foundation, chronic migraines, like mine, are defined as having a migraine more often than not. That means I experience more than 15 migraines a month. In reality, it’s more like 25.

I learned there is a double standard when you have an invisible illness. People seem to think that just because you don’t look sick that you’re not. That’s not true though. Even if we don’t look visibly sick, we are still suffering. Even if we drag ourselves to school or work or an event, we are still suffering. It’s belittling and frustrating when people don’t believe you.

However, I also learned a lot about myself.

I am a fighter.

I'm a migraine educator.

I will try my hardest to get to class, work, or any other obligation.

I will always feel guilty when I cancel on plans. Even when my friends and family understand, the guilt never leaves me.

I’ve learned to listen to my body. If it needs time to rest, then it needs time to rest.

I am strong.