The Universe Is Saving Something Special For You

The Universe Is Saving Something Special For You

You are here in this world, right now, because you are meant to be here, and nobody could ever replace you.
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Stop whatever you are doing right now.

First things first, I want you to take a second and just breathe. Next, I need you to listen to me very carefully.

I see you.

I'm serious. I know what you are going through, and I know that there is so much more happening in your head that you tell no one about. I know you are working your butt off right now to make ends meet, to pass your classes, to make your family proud, to keep your friends from realizing you are about two seconds from falling apart.

Your feelings are valid.

You probably are not told this enough, but it is true. What you are feeling right now—you are allowed to have those feelings. When you lie awake at night, staring at the ceiling and wondering if it ever gets easier—it is okay. You can feel whatever you feel. Nobody should make you feel like your thoughts and emotions are not important enough because they are. No matter how small or insignificant you think they are.

You are important.

Now, I know for sure you are not told this one as often as you should. If I could scream it from the rooftops and plaster it on sticky notes all over your house and write it on signs everywhere you go, would you start to believe it? I do not know who or what made you feel like you are not important. That was wrong. You are so, incredibly important, and this world would not be the place it is if you were not a part of it exactly the way you are.

It is ok to not be ok.

You do not have to act like you have it all together all the time. I know putting on a show for everyone to see makes it all seem easier—less questions, fewer people worrying, not having to face your inner demons. It is ok, though. You do not have to keep your mask up. Hell, let it crumble to the ground in tiny, shimmering pieces. Let a few tears fall to the floor. Life can wait, I promise.

You do not have to have it all figured out.

I am going to let you in on a little secret: nobody knows what they are doing. You are supposed to have doubts and take risks and make mistakes. That is how you know you are truly living, my friend, and though it is terrifying, it is what makes you human.

I know you want to have everything put together. You like knowing what happens next, you have to have a plan, there is no time for messing up, life will not give you a second chance. That is just life. I have full faith that you will figure it out when the time is right.

The Universe is saving something special for you.

You are here for a reason. It is not to work until you die, or to focus on what others think of you, or worry about all that could be or never will. You are here, right now, because you are meant to be here. You are unique, and nobody could ever replace you.

Even if you do not believe in yourself, I do. The Universe does. If it seems like everything is falling apart and you cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel, take a breath and wait. I know it is hard, but it will be worth it. There is something special that only you can do and that only you can be given.

Go, be great. I believe in you.

Cover Image Credit: Courtney Henderson-Wasmund

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Better Not Bitter

"Let your past make you better, not bitter."

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After completing my junior year at Iowa State, I have found myself reflecting on a lot of the experiences and people who have helped me get to the point I am at today. Family obviously comes to mind, followed by my friends, my sorority sisters, my boyfriend, my professors, and my mentors. I am able to contribute a lot of my success to their support and compassion that they have shown me throughout my past three years. I am also able to contribute my success to the woman I have grown to be and to the woman I have always wanted to be. You see, three years ago, the woman I was was buried in a toxic relationship that didn't allow me to flourish into the woman I was striving to be.

Let me take a step back, this article is not meant to bash the person who it is about. In fact, it's more of a thank you. Because you see, without him letting go of me, I would have never taken the leaps and bounds out of my comfort zone to become the woman I am so damn proud to be today. This is also not meant to say that I am I glad I was in such a toxic relationship, it was honestly so terrible that I wouldn't wish it upon anyone but I am in fact, thankful. I learned more from that relationship that I have in anything else in my life.

First, I learned to be a fighter, and not in a bad way. I learned to stand up for myself and what I believe in. I have become vocal about my passions and stand up for people when they are treated wrong. I no longer let people walk all over me, but rather I stand my ground firmly and confidently. Thank you.

Second, I learned to be fierce. Fierce in love, kindness, compassion, and willpower. I believe in my abilities and the things I am able to accomplish if I set my mind to something. I have learned that in being fierce, there is absolutely no time to doubt myself which has worked greatly in my favor. I learned that demanding respect in all relationships I have formed has been about me making the decision to make myself a priority and learning to never settle for any less than I deserve, ever again. Thank you.

Third, I learned compassion. I learned to be kind to the other woman, and mostly, to the person who chose to hurt me. It took everything in me to remain kind while I was being hurt, but I am so thankful that I stayed true to the values and morals I was raised on. I have carried this with me throughout the past three years by choosing to show compassion to all people around me, and looking deeper into the reasons behind the actions and decisions that people make. Often times there is something going on behind closed doors and because of that, it is important to always, always radiate kindness. Thank you.

I wanted to extend my gratitude to the person who hurt me because if you hadn't, I wouldn't be the badass, boss girl, powerful woman that I am today. I am confident, smart, loving, and fully capable of giving and receiving the kindest, most sincere kind of love. My life has changed for the better, and I wouldn't change a single thing. I wish you the best, because let me tell ya, it feels great.

By the way, if you ever feel like you deserve better than what you're receiving in a relationship, trust your gut & walk the hell away. It's worth it.

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Internet outraged at Delhi Aunty for Sl*t Shaming

Public outrage - justified or an overreaction?

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When the topic of sexual violence against women arises, women are often held responsible - because of how they dress, or how they behave, or even if they have a voice. A recent incident in Delhi showed that the mindset of people has not changed. In a video posted by Shivani Gupta, a middle-aged woman is seen defending her claim, "Women wearing short dresses deserve to be raped."

This backward mentality surrounding rape and rape culture is horrifying to see. The middle-aged woman first shamed them for wearing short clothes and when she was confronted, she told them "they deserved to get raped." She made things worse when she told other men in the restaurant to rape such women who wear short clothes.

Shivani and her friends later confronted this woman while taking the video. They wanted a public apology for her statement and followed her around. The older woman stood by her statement. Fair enough. They felt threatened by her statements and wanted an apology for her actions. The older lady, however, was brazen about her ideologies and refused to apologize. In fact, she threatened to call the cops for harassment.

The woman who made the regressive statements. Shivani Gupta

While the anger and outrage by the women who uploaded this video are justified, several questions are being raised on whether the older woman was later harassed for her statements. Public shaming is not the way to solve this issue.

"We cannot dismantle a culture of shaming by participating in it." - Rega Jha.

Now, I believe that nobody must engage in victim shaming. Nobody has the right to police the outfit one wishes to wear. It is astonishing to believe that even in the 21st century, people still believe that an outfit determines the morality and character of a person. That older woman was wrong to sl*t-shame the girls for wearing what they want. That being said, even though what that woman did was horrible, public shaming will not work. It will not change the mindset behind these ideologies. What that older woman did was akin to bullying. Publicly shaming her, stalking her facebook account or posting comments or by coercing her, you are also behaving in the same manner of bullying.

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