When I decided to head back to college two years ago, I was excited. Most of my family was excited as well. I texted my three close friends to tell them I registered for the Fall semester at our local community college. Although I was glad to be moving forward in my life, it was after those texts that I realized how distant I had become to these friends. I got no response, not even a congratulations. I understood it may not have been big news since I had struggled with college in the past, but to get no response was surprising.

However, a couple of weeks after this, one of these friends, who I'll call "Melissa," called me to ask if I could give her a ride somewhere. When I told her I was headed to work and couldn't do it, she replied, "Ok, I thought maybe you could, since I called everyone else. Oh well then, see you later."

That was the entire conversation. There was no hi, how are you, not even an invite to lunch to catch up. I had hung out with these friends since high school. We had so many fun memories, as well as supporting one another through heartache and hardship. However, after high school, we hung out less frequently. I had falsely assumed that although adulthood had made it harder to see one another, we still found time to catch up and to see how the group was doing. In my case, I wanted to make sure everyone was doing well since we always looked out for one another.

About a year after not seeing these friends, I saw "Kayla," another girl in the group, working at a retail store. I said hi to her, and was genuinely excited to see her. I was about to hug her and ask how she was doing when she said something that made me realize that our friendship was no longer that.

Kayla told me with a straight face, "I thought you were dead, the group doesn't see you anymore."

In shock, I awkwardly smiled and replied, "Oh, I'm still alive and kicking."

I had to walk away since I didn't know how else to respond. I pondered that statement the rest of the day. Dead? I tried to keep contact, but I never had any responses. I was only called to see if I could give anyone a ride.

It's hard to realize that people that you once regarded as your best friends are no longer a major part of your life. It can make you wonder if it was your fault if you didn't do enough to reach out. Sometimes there is not a definitive point when the friendship deteriorates, it just gradually fades away.

It's especially hard when these people are so close they can be considered family. It wasn't an easy decision, but I eventually deleted their numbers from my phone. It's been a little over two years since I've contacted them. I still hope they are doing well, and becoming successful in their own right, but I know I could never again call them my friends.