What people don’t tell you about college is:
1. It’s lonely.
No matter how many friends you make, you are going to feel really lonely at one point or another. You’re in a new environment and you don’t have your normal crowd with you to make you feel at home. What is even more lonely is when you realize you haven’t been living to your full potential and want to change and you have to step out of your comfort zone you have created in order to become your best self. You hear all the time that you make your lifelong friends in college and while I still believe that to be the case, I feel like there is too much pressure put on that statement. You will meet some amazing people throughout college but odds are the people you meet first will not be the people you automatically form a lifelong connection with. Friendships, genuine, deep friendships take time. Don’t stress out if you don’t have them yet.
2. It's scary.
You as a young adult have to navigate around your new schedule and meeting new people. It is scary not knowing where to go but especially who to hang out with. You could become super close to someone and not truly get to know them until something happens. It’s really frightening putting your trust into someone you just met but you have to because you have to branch out and see who is out there.
3. You’ll feel lost.
There will come a point where you will take a step back and look around and feel completely lost. No matter who you are, you will change in college. It is a fact of life, you are always changing. The thing you have to work extra hard on is making sure you are changing for the better. It is really easy to fall into habits or follow what the crowd is doing when you know you don’t want to be like them. You were born to stand out and be a leader, you have to dig deep inside of yourself and find the girl who has dreams, hopes, and so much potential. Sometimes it is hard when you realize you are becoming someone you don’t want to be. But in those moments, you have to remember you are stronger than you know and capable of becoming the person God created you to be.
4. You’ll think about what life would be like if you were somewhere else.
You will without a doubt envision what life would have been like if you chose the other option. What if I had continued my volleyball career and gone off somewhere to play? What if I chose to go far away? What if I had followed everyone else and stayed in my bubble from home? But the thing about all these what-ifs is that they didn’t happen. You chose where you are at right now because something inside of you led your heart here. God has you in his hands no matter where and he is with you at the exact place you are currently. When you start to doubt you have to remember that God has and always will have his hands on your life. He’s written your story before you even opened your eyes for the first time.
5. You’ll wonder if this is how you’re supposed to feel.
While I know it is hard, I think it is normal to feel this way. Everyone goes through these things, and you should never feel like any of it is your fault. While it is scary and beyond confusing I still believe it is okay to feel these feelings because we are young adults, we don’t have all the answers, no one does. But we are figuring it out along the way.
College is a crazy adventure for everyone. Everyone’s college story looks different, none are the same. We face new trials, feelings, and thoughts every day. It is really hard. But this piece was not written to discourage. This is to help better understand that if you are in college reading this, you are not alone. And if you are about to embark on college, just know that if you ever feel these things, you are not alone. I personally have felt all of these things and wondered if I am doing the right things. But what I have come to realize is that there is no perfect way to do college. You are going to make mistakes, fail an exam or two, lose some friends, and cry. But you are also going to learn from your mistakes, study hard and get an A on an exam, gain some of the best friends you never saw coming, and laugh harder than you’ve ever thought you could. College is an experience, you are constantly learning, be patient with yourself and always remember you are never alone.