This week, we saw our country so overwhelmingly divided. Not in recent history have we as Americans been able to look to our neighbor, and feel a sense of hatred so strong.

I was watching an ad from the Ad Council featuring John Cena, and it talked about the “average” American. When we picture the “average” American, not everyone pictures a woman. Not everyone pictures an individual of color. Not everyone pictures a veteran or even someone with a disability. The reality is, the overwhelming majority of Americans belong to a minority group.

Each day when the sun rises, millions of women will go to work at jobs that they fought for, possibly more than they should have. Millions of veterans will go to work without a thank you or acknowledgment for their service to this country. Millions of Americans of color will feel the fire of discrimination. This is not the America that I was taught to love.

So we have to remember how to love again, because we as Americans have a lot of work to do.

We have to remember that as Americans, we put ourselves in the situation we’re in. We can grumble all day about government and about corruption, but at the end of the day, we as people control how we act toward our fellow Americans. We as people decide what values we choose to live by, and we as people decide how to move forward.

We as a people need to celebrate the diversity in this country and encourage it. When we do the opposite, we all lose. Every American loses.

A while ago, I learned about a principle of public speaking called the “skyhook principle." It’s a technique that encourages speakers to find common moral ground between their audiences, and unify them despite their differences.

So, America, let this be a skyhook principle.

Let’s decide together what values we can all agree on, and find a way to move forward. Hatred for your neighbor is never in the best interest of the neighborhood, and I guarantee you, where we are headed is not in the best interest of our country.

So let’s find a reason to love our neighbor. Let’s find reasons to celebrate the differences in this country. Let’s be the best America that we can be.

Because then, we all win. Every American wins.