How The Music Department Changed My Life
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How The Music Department Changed My Life

Joining was the best decision I ever made.

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How The Music Department Changed My Life
Corinne Roob

Once you graduate, you may look back on high school and think it wasn't much of a struggle compared to adulthood. But when you're making your way through four years of a clique-filled and test-heavy system, you don't see much past the upcoming Friday night football game. Like any other teen, I struggled with the whole "finding myself" ordeal (or whatever you'd like to call it). I was tired of joining clubs that were more of a nuisance than an extracurricular, attempting to make friends with people with whom I had nothing in common. I simply did not fit in anywhere I tried. I mean, isn't that every teenager's worst fear? Well, I convinced myself that it didn't matter because I had zero interest in compromising my identity to please anyone else. However, having a confidence like this in a place where nearly everyone falls victim to their own insecurities doesn't really click either, so there wasn't much loyalty to chose from. I grew to loathe high school -- I walked around with a bad attitude and played the sick card every chance I got because I dreaded the thought of getting up at 5:30 a.m. and spending eight hours irritated and alone in my thoughts.

Then came the time when I grew sick of what few close friends I had not being able to hang out with me because they were always busy with marching band practices and performances. I'd get so annoyed and wonder how people could enjoy spending hours upon hours physically and mentally exhausting themselves on and off the field -- until they convinced me to join. Having no experience with reading or playing music, I tried flag line first, but after one day at flag camp, I knew that wasn't going to happen because the crowd was (once again), just not for me. If I was going to spend the money and commit to band, I was going to do it right, and since I'm not one for puffy skirts and glitter bows, that only left me with one other option.

Eventually, I gave in and learned to play an instrument, pushing myself in areas I never had before. I was terrified and intimidated at first since learning to read music is no easier than learning to read another language, but who knew that within just two weeks I would be able to play nearly ten different pieces with little to no mistakes? It was painful and exhausting at first, but I thrived on putting in as much effort as I could because, well, how often do we find something that we're so passionate about in this lifetime? It was certainly a huge help to have directors who pushed their students to be the best they could be and to have fun in the process. By the time I graduated, I had been first chair in two different concert bands, one being a higher-ranking ensemble. There are no words to effectively describe how proud of myself I was for stepping out of my comfort zone and trying something new, because I unexpectedly discovered I was a natural.

With a year of music experience under my belt, I decided to branch out even further and join choir my last year in high school. Although I'm a decent public speaker and never found much issue with speaking to large crowds, I wasn't experienced with any structured singing outside of the shower and occasional car karaoke. Nevertheless, I had heard nothing but positive things about the relatively new choir director, so I wasn't too worried. My choice lied between a sophomore-senior level choir or a freshman choir. Due to a schedule mix-up, I ended up being the only senior female in a choir full of freshmen, fresh off the boat from middle school -- every almost-graduate's dream, right? Nothing against them, but the goals were a little different -- I was there to try something new while most of them were there to compete and prove themselves worthy of audition choirs.

Well, little did I know that it would turn out to be yet another life changing experience. I didn't think my voice was nails-on-a-chalkboard awful, but I wouldn't have realized I actually have a little talent in me until said choir director worked her magic and brought me out of my shell. Even on the worst of days -- even being the only senior in a sea of hormonal and insecure freshmen, I found myself singing publicly and unashamed. Never in my life did I imagine that I would be performing music vocally (let alone by myself) in front of hundreds of people. Somehow, I came so far out of my shell that, not only did I prepare and perform a solo where I scored much higher than I expected with help from my phenomenal director, but I even put together a band to accompany me in singing my senior solo at the end of the year. I had gone from a pissed-off, unmotivated, lost, and lonely student to an enthusiastic, ambitious, and inspirational musician. My influences on others were small, but after receiving a hand-written and illustrated card right before graduation from a shy, reserved girl in my section telling me how much of an impact I had on her over the past year, I knew joining the music department was the best decision I had ever made. And I knew I wasn't alone.

"My involvement in band has helped me create strong, lasting, loving relationships with many people. It has expanded my circle of life through school and has helped me become a better person." -- Joshua M. Kubiak

It felt amazing to have staff members who treated us like friends and students, and not solely the latter -- having a director who cared more about our mental health and improvement and providing us with such an accepting environment than drilling grades into our heads is a major key to any student's success. It gave me something to work for, something to focus on and be proud of while at the same time, it genuinely made me happy. It changed the way I see the world and helped me overcome fears and weaknesses I didn't even know I had. I can only hope my own, personal experience with taking a risk can send a message, so if you take anything away from this article, let it be this: don't let fear stop you from trying new things. Who knows where they could take you or what you'll accomplish by expanding your options -- I mean, hey, I still have yet to find out.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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