A few days ago, I broke down, joined the masses, and went to see Girl’s Trip. While a large portion of me was only interested in the movie because it is one of few blockbusters with a mainly female and Black cast, I now wholeheartedly believe that this movie transcends the importance of racial or gender representation, and instead focuses on an even rarer demographic in American cinema: friend groups.

Most Hollywood films follow the individual or a pair within a group, but the group tends to be composed of family, coworkers, supernatural beings, and/or aliens 95% of the time. Because of this, The Art of The Squad^TM can often be underappreciated. While the formation of a lasting group of friends can occur at any time, most groups are formed during college. Just like everything else in life, friendships are all about balance. Not all friend groups are created equal and the likelihood of survival relies on the possession and stabilization of few key elements.

In the hopes of helping to form and maintain any current or future “Flossy Posses,” “Clatchet Clans,” or “Crisp Crews”, I have compiled a list of areas that, when regarded, are conducive to strong, lasting friendships (I call it Squad-ology^TM):

Know your role(s)

From the ‘life of the party’ friend to the ‘Nurturing’ friend to the ‘So ambitious everyone else is swept in with the momentum’ friend, each group needs a balanced amount of characters and roles to be filled. This does not mean that there cannot be overlap or that friends’ roles cannot change and grow over time, but each quality must be present.

When you count on a group of people for all of your support, you need them to be able to deliver. Your friend group should be a One Stop Shop for all your necessities: comfort, motivation, and even an occasional foot up your a** when necessary. The specific qualities will vary from person to person, but knowing what you need, and having the people that can deliver is important.

Have realistic expectations

Also read: set your expectations. If you know you are the type of person that needs to spend a lot of face-to-face time with people, let it be known. If you are the type of person that will need your space regularly, let it be known. The way you need comfort, care, motivation, love, etc. are all important for your friends to know in order for them to do their part.

Most importantly, the way in which you communicate; whether you will be the type of friends to have big blow outs and come crawling back for atonement, the type of friends that will talk it out in that moment, the type of friends that will put everything on blast no matter where you are and when it is, or even some combination of all available options; is necessary knowledge for everyone. This will save a lot of headaches and maybe even your friendship.

Be accepting of change

Long friendships mean watching each other grow and blossom. If you are the type of person that places your friends in a box of ‘this is who they are and I can count on them for this,’ you will feel like they have failed you at some point; however, in reality, it will be you who failed. The failure to give your friends the room, space and encouragement to grow into who they are and accept who they become is an integral part of making any friendship last.

Be good to each other

It does not matter how much you love and care about your friends if they don’t know. Even the most low-maintenance friendships have an established way of communicating their care with one another. Whether it be a simple “hey, how are you” text every once in a while to regularly telling them to spend all of your time together, there must be an established way of showing you care. You wouldn’t expect your significant other to stay with you if they felt unloved (unless you really shouldn’t be dating), so why should your friends? Relationships are relationships, whether platonic or romantic and require similar amounts and types of work.

At the end of the day, it’s about valuing the people around you and communicating that. The truth is, without support from our friends and family, even if we were to somehow manage to accomplish things, it would be a lot more difficult and a lot less gratifying. So if you have a group of friends that you haven’t told how much you care about them lately, this is your reminder to do so. If you don’t have one yet, this is your reminder to do so in the future. If you are your own friend group and like it that way, this is your reminder to treat yourself as such. Now that you are officially a Squad-ology Master^TM you and your squad will flourish. Because at the end of the day, life is all about the people who will sit with you in the dark when you can no longer see the light.