"Why do I feel like God's talking to everyone except me?"
"Is He just not dealing with me?"
"Has He ever really been there to begin with?"

Ever asked yourself any of these questions? Because I have... a lot. The older that I get, the more that I understand the importance of a relationship with God; so if I have the head-knowledge that God is always there for me, why don't I feel Him in my heart? If you can relate even remotely, I may be able to clarify a bit for you through part of my own testimony.

I spent a long time going through these motions where I felt like I was constantly reaching up, but God wasn't reaching down. I was reading my Bible every single day (I can say that with complete honesty). I worked in ministry and attended service any time that I possibly could; if there wasn't a service going on at my church for some reason, I'd find one down the road to attend. I was spending time in my prayer closet at home regularly. Can I be transparent? Even after all of this, I still always felt like God wasn't concerned for me. It was like He was so busy dealing with everything else that He couldn't take the time to let me know that He was there and that He loved me.

Eventually, I got tired of feeling this way enough to try something new. I had spent months questioning God's character when in reality, I should've been questioning my own self in order to see if there was anything that I could change. The more that I thought about it, the more I began to realize about why I felt so distant from God. Here's where it began:

As many people know, I've never met my biological father. This isn't something new that I've had to deal with; I don't get emotional talking about it. It's simply a part of my life that's just always been there. Even though I grew up with loving parents, I still had questions about my biological father. Always.

"Why wasn't I enough for him to stay?"

"Where could he be right now?"

"Does he have other kids that he's spending time with?"


"If he knows that I exist, why isn't he trying to talk to me?"

Friend, are you beginning to see the similarities between the questions aimed at my biological father and my questions aimed toward God?

Finally, I realized: I've been looking at God as if He were some higher version of my biological father. I never even met my birth dad who was on earth, so how could I possibly have an intimate relationship with a Heavenly Father who I have to believe loves me by faith? We've always heard that God was our father, and He is. However, my subconscious decided for me that my Heavenly Father was going to treat me exactly like my biological father did. Friends, it is dangerous when we get the mindset that God has the capacity to act like humans because He cannot. Where sin nature caused my biological father to leave, God's nature caused Him to pick me up and be proud that He could call me His daughter. Once I stopped believing that God had human-like tendencies, I was able to see Him for who He really is: a Father who wants nothing more than to have a relationship with His children. Including me.

I still haven't met my biological father yet and I don't know if my curiosity will ever quite drive me to that point, but even if I never do, don't feel like I'm missing out. God provided me with the most excellent and amazing possible man to be my earthly father, and I couldn't ask for anything better.

There's a difference between human-traits and God-traits. What human-traits have you put on God today? Remove them from your concept of Him, and I promise that it will change your life.