I was going back in forth all week debating on whether or not I wanted to write this article because it might come off the wrong way since its still such a “touchy” subject, but what I’ve learned from social media is that people can make anything a touchy subject, so I just felt like this topic needed to be addressed. I wanted to bring up the topic of interracial relationships. Now before I get into this, I just want to say I’m all for interracial relationships. Hell, there was one time I was in one. But one thing I’ve seen from being in them is that they do come with their complications. I know some of you are thinking, “What the hell is he talking about. It's 2016 and nobody cares about that stuff anymore.” Well, I thought so too, but the sad truth is that there are still families out there that do look at color and care about it. I guess that’s just one of the complications that comes with interracial relationships.
You see, when you date someone outside of your race, sometimes you have the anxious feeling that the other person’s family won’t accept you because of your color. I know not all interracial couples care about it, but there are some that do, and I want to tell their side. The funny part about it is that I’ve seen it from both sides of race, too. When I mean both sides I’m talking about white and black. I had a friend who told me that they dated a white girl and said that her family didn’t want him anywhere near their sight. When he told me, I wanted to be surprised but I wasn’t since that wasn’t the first time I’ve heard a white family not accepting someone of color into their family. But I’ll admit I was kind of surprised to learn some black families can be like that just as much. I know because I’ve seen it through a few of my family members. Now don’t get me wrong, those family members aren’t to the point where they would say, “Don’t bring that white chick in our home.” Believe me it’s nothing like that. But they are the ones to say comments that indicate that they do care about color. Some of them would say little things like, “Oh you talking to a new girl, huh? Let me guess — is she white?” You see what I mean? It’s like my family’s way of saying, “oh yeah if you bring her around we’ll accept her ... but we still wish you brought someone of our own culture.
Now I’ve got that part out the way, I can address the real issues I’ve seen through interracial dating. I only had been in one interracial relationship for a few months and the three girlfriends I had before that were black. I can’t speak for any other race, but from me being a black guy, I’ve seen two things happen while dating someone who’s from another culture: 1) Your pro blackness suddenly gets questioned or 2) People automatically assume you don’t like black women anymore. For the first point, if people know me, they would know I’m all about black empowerment in the black community. But what I’ve learn is that if you tell people that you dated someone from another race one time that anything you say from there on is bullsh*t. I’ve heard people say that, “I don’t get how political black leaders can go on about being pro black when they are dating a white person.” Look, I know where they are coming from, but just because that person dates someone with a different color then them doesn’t mean they don’t care about black empowerment like the next black activist right next to them. Fun fact: dating someone white does not suddenly eliminate the fact that racism can still happen to you or your children. Now let that sink in.
The second point I want to address is when you date someone of a different race that your own race assumes that you don’t like your own women anymore. Now look, I’m not saying that there aren’t guys like that out in the black community. Hell, I’ve met a few of them and personally, I don’t like it when black men bash their own women, but trust and believe me when I say I'm not like them. Ever since I dated a white girl that one time, I would hear stuff from some family members or people from my school saying stuff like, “Oh, Derrick doesn't date black girls anymore” or “you know he only chase after those white girls.” Say what? I don’t know who told you that me dating outside my race one time in my life made me stop liking black women, but they lied to you. I love me some black women. I’m going to say that again just in case you weren’t paying attention. I love me some black women! Let me put it to you this way. If Halle Berry, Gabrielle Union, or Kelly Rowland called my phone right now and asked me to come over, you honestly think I’m going to say, “Oh sorry, ladies. Even though ya’ll fine as hell, I can’t come over because I don’t date black girls anymore”. No! If either one of them gave me the time of day, I’m running to their houses like Drake run through six with his woes.
Now look, it’s like I said before, I think interracial relationships can be great thing. No matter what anyone says, I feel like you should love anyone you want to no matter what race they are. But just know that sometimes there will be some people who might have a problem with it so you best put your guards up just in case. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to watch "X-Men: Days of Future’s Past" with Halle Berry’s fine *ss. Peace.