Right off the bat: this article is anything but tongue in cheek. As someone who is committed to being a follower of Jesus (or in more general terms, committed to being a Christian), I am not targeting this article to the often loathed "secular society." This is not so much an attack on those who differ in faith, but rather an open letter to my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ.

Now, my words will be published a week after I write this, but due to the current social-political climate we currently live in, the art of seeking to understand others (the ability to see and comprehend the world from others' perspectives, which differ from your own) will remain as relevant as ever. Specifically, they will remain relevant for Christians, as we operate within our respective surrounding communities and cultures.

The art of seeking to understand is, in and of itself, very straightforward:

Foster a heart that longs to serve others.

You might be wondering what serving has to do with listening, but the two naturally correlate: a key part of being able to serve others is to intentionally listen and understand them. When you condition your heart to not just understand where others are coming from, but condition your heart to also desire putting yourself below them, to lower your own self, in order to lift up those around you, it becomes easier to value others voices. Having a servant's heart (intentionally striving to put others' emotions and needs above your own) will give you the mental posture of valuing other people's opinions and viewpoints, and looking to understand them, instead of just waiting for your turn in a conversation to interject and spout your own opinion. In the day and age where many believers and nonbelievers of Jesus have been forced to walk past angry evangelists with megaphones and picket signs, maybe we should use our servant-conditioned hearts to lift up others' voices, and not our own.

Hold back on constant opinion giving.

This comes with the latter half of what was just discussed: valuing others' voices above your own. "A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion" (Proverbs 18:2 ESV). It can be tempting in the time we are in as Christians to want to "speak light" into every circumstance. But how often are we speaking light versus speaking our own opinion? And how often do we discern that what we are saying in the heat of the moment is truly speaking light, or speaking biblical truth? More often than not, it is best to allow those around us to speak of their opinions, life stories, and experiences, truly hear them out, and make sure we are understanding and hearing them correctly. Doing all of this (and taking pleasure in it, as the Lord wants us to) ensures that we are not blindly firing our opinions, but rather we are actively engaged in understanding others before turning to God to allow us to speak light. Which leads into the final part of the process:

Rely on God to guide how you respond to others.

The most applicable of the psalms when dealing with heavy, social-political dialogue in this day and age is Psalm 141:3 (NIV): "Set a guard over my mouth, Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips." When we ask God to guard our mouth, we are putting the power over what words we see on Him. We do not rely on our own understanding or whatever immediate reaction we may have when someone first explains their perspective or experience. It is about giving the authority over what "light" we speak to others over to God. For Him to keep watch over what we say ensures that we do not strive to interject our own opinions, but rather we remain patient for His perfect prompting to discussion.

Following God's Word and Commands as to improve our ability of seeking to understand others may be particularly challenging: in this day and age dialogue, both online with social media and in person face to face, happens quickly. It can be tempting to want to constantly share what you think is God's voice (but in reality may often just be your own opinion) into every conversation you have. But let us not forget that it was Jesus who came to earth, humbled Himself in serving others, would be inquisitive in dealing with peoples questions (putting their thought process and conclusions into focus, rather than going around telling everyone how and why they were wrong), and relied openly on the Wisdom of God to direct His words and actions. May we strive to replicate Jesus' art of seeking to understand others in the current hyper-political, opinion-giving climate we find ourselves operating under.