To the boys who wronged me,
Thank you. Yes, I said it. I said thank you. You opened endless doors of opportunity for me to find exactly who I am. You have helped me see that all I need to do is love myself! But when I say "all I need" as if loving yourself is some simple task, I really mean thank you for leading me to nights of tears and wads of Kleenex sprawled around my head as I woke from the damp pillow wondering what I did wrong. But I had done nothing wrong. Nothing at all.
If you've ever been told "she's better than you'll ever be," you will begin to understand just how incredibly motivating it is. You are trying to tell me that some other girl is superior to me? Not a chance. No sir, do not try and tear me down and turn me against my own sisters. I will show you just how I am uniquely wonderful in my own ways. I will show you what you're missing--what you will never again have the chance to have.
Now, I'm not saying that my ex-boyfriends are at fault or that the boy who continuously left me on read should take credit for how awesome I am today. I just want to thank them for showing me on my way, on to a better life for myself. This also is most definitely not an "I hate boys" article. It's just about being comfortable with yourself. Because we all know loving yourself just doesn't happen. There is so much more than just being happy with yourself. It takes a lot of practice and a lot of confidence.
Sticking with your own opinions, your own beliefs, backing yourself up when no one else will, that takes guts. And girl, you know you wouldn't have had the guts to do it before, but you've learned how to. When he walked out on you, you really didn’t know exactly how to fly on your own. It’s an interesting thing to experience because each person does it differently. High school love seems to have a weird effect on people, and in high school, you are supposed to start finding yourself. And I did, with the help from some of those boys.
I was wrapped up in this thought that love was perfect and finding someone else was the way I’d become something more whole. The other day, I read something that went along the lines of “I am not searching for my other half, because I am already a whole.” This was beyond compelling to me, because I am a whole. I used to think I needed someone else’s love, reassurance, just another human to define me as whole. I am whole, and because I am whole, I’m not looking for another half to complete me. I’m looking for another whole to make a beautiful life with. Figuring this all out at a young age is pretty liberating. It shows me not to lower my standards, and I think every single girl should know their worth.So thank you to the boys who tossed me aside, thank you to the boys who wouldn’t give me a second glance, thank you to the boys who just stopped replying. You lead me down this wonderful road of self-love and discovery of just how amazing I am. Thank you for convincing me that I didn’t need one of you to make me whole. I am whole alone. And that doesn’t mean I don’t need anyone ever, it just means I know how to be alone on my own. So, yes, thank you to the boys who wronged me.