Sometimes, breakups are messy. They're confusing and overwhelming, and even when the reasons behind them are valid, they can still get pretty messy.
There's no beautiful way to make an exit.
The most important thing for a healing heart is giving yourself time to process and appreciate all that you have learned from each relationship.
You never truly understand how unprecedented a person is until they give you things you couldn't give yourself. They give you security and warmth, and they reveal different parts of you.
I have not always been the best at breakups, and, sometimes, my emotions get the best of me and dictate final conversations. But if I dated you, it was for a reason.
To all the men I've dated, thank you for dumping me. But more importantly, thank you for dating me.
Without those flopped relationships, I wouldn't know how to be open and vulnerable. I wouldn't know how to find my confidence and share my life with someone. I wouldn't know how to let myself feel things and become part of someone else's life.
Without you, I wouldn't have learned new ways to communicate and work through issues. I wouldn't even know what my own personal issues were.
Without you, I wouldn't have known where I needed to improve. I wouldn't have learned my own faults, weaknesses or insecurities.
Without your patience and guidance, I wouldn't be the person I am now.
I wouldn't be confident and self-assured. I wouldn't be ready for the next thing in life, ready to take aim and go. I wouldn't be so goal-oriented or proud of myself. You made me learn to be proud of myself. You each instilled in me my own self-worth.
You made me feel valuable in moments when I felt disposable.
I do not always give you credit for the good, and I've been too quick to credit you for the bad. We both had lessons to learn, and I am grateful to have learned them.
The biggest thing I need to thank you for is for ending things when you knew it was no longer for us.
I don't want someone to hang out in a relationship they don't feel emotionally committed to.
There is a deep validation in recognizing when something isn't working, and even if we saw it differently, it is OK that you needed something else.
It is OK for me not to be your person, even if I cried, and even if I didn't want to see you or talk to you anymore.
It's OK that you broke me for a moment to let us both find real happiness later on.
You gave us an opportunity I wasn't strong enough to acknowledge. You wanted more for me, as well as more for yourself — even if I missed that part of the conversation or chose not to hear it.
We were two parts of a broken relationship, but more importantly, we were two parts of some beautiful memories.
Thank you for making them with me.
I wish you all the best in life, even if I haven't said it; even if we avoid each other and cannot find a way to be friends; even if you're married now or in a different place.
I will always care for you.
To all the men of my past, thank you for dating me.