Towering With Confidence—The Struggle Of Finding Contentment With Being A Tall Woman

Towering With Confidence—The Struggle Of Finding Contentment With Being A Tall Woman

How turning one's greatest insecurity into one's greatest source of confidence is the ultimate form of self-love.

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Navigating the unknown waters of growing up is a different, yet oddly similar, experience for everyone, united by bad hair days, braces, unavoidable awkwardness, trying to make friends, and discovering who one is meant to be. At a time when our interests, talents, skills, eccentricities, and self-esteem are being constantly re-shaped and refined, a common link found in most people's psyche during those developmental years is the desire to fit in with others, or at the very least, not be considered an outcast.

I was generally a confident person growing up, I had friends, got good grades, loved my school, and sought to be kind to everyone I met. My greatest insecurity, however, was rooted solely in the unkind opinions and comments of others that fueled my immense dislike for something that I now look at as one of my greatest attributes: my height. In second grade, I already stood at five feet tall. By the time I hit my growth spurt (well, another one) at the end of fourth grade, I had soared to stand at 5'8", and only a few years later, upon entering high school, I was 5'11", gangly and still taller than the majority of boys and girls in my freshman class.

In elementary school, whenever my small class of 25 would be lined up alphabetically for an assembly, mass, or to go to lunch, it was me who broke, like a skyscraper, away from the small, even, village of heads next to me; after hearing whispered complaints of "I can't see!" enough times during class or group pictures, it became second nature for me to walk to the back of the crowd of girls and stand tower over the boys who had not yet grown themselves; and it was when I was told by a group of girls one day that I was "too tall" to play with them on the slides at recess that I began to spend more time with myself or other small groups of kids hanging out apart from the crowd.

Not knowing how to or if I should stand up for myself, I willingly went by taunting nicknames like The Giant and String Bean from girls and boys alike, half-heartedly laughing off the poisonous sting those words inflicted on my self-confidence. If I ever muttered, "I hate being tall!" to a family member, he or she would immediately pat me on the shoulder and say "No, it's beautiful!" even though I felt far from it. Although adults would gawk at me when I entered a room or would admiringly ask "How tall are you?" the subsequent praise that followed did, like the comments from family members, little to reassure me that I was okay just the way I was. Looking back on it now, I don't understand why when one doesn't like oneself, compliments from anyone other than one's peers are rendered seemingly invalid, but they were at the time.

It was not until I was nearing high school when everyone around me (and subsequently, their views on height) started growing that I came to see the beauty in my individuality. I began making varsity sports teams simply because coaches wanted to work with my height; I could now share cool clothes with my mom and older teenage friends; I was never denied entry to any ride at an amusement park, or was thought to be too young to do things like fly by myself; because I looked older, it was assumed I could be trusted with more responsibility, and after being hired at my first sought-after job at sixteen, it took my managers months to find out that I was not, despite their beliefs, twenty years old; I could only shop at clothing stores intended for adults, and managed to rock Tall clothes that accentuated my endless legs and arms; I understood that getting asked to help friends and strangers alike reach things made me feel special and that my ability to see over crowds at concerts was an experience within itself.

Today, I stand at an even six feet tall, and have come to love every long, able, lively, and beautiful inch of myself, yet, had it not been for those years when I wished I could be like my shorter friends, I would likely not be able to look at myself in the mirror today and understand that although the road to finding self-acceptance was long and difficult, it made the battle to obtain and achieve self-love all the more fulfilling.

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.

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Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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Self-Reflection Is Always Beneficial

Always ask yourself how you can improve your life.

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Self reflection is an important part of growing up. It is important to sit back and think about who you are and who you strive to be. I think that dwelling on the past too much can be extremely harmful, but that a little bit of reflecting on your past can be great.

Think about it, every choice you have made in your life so far has led to where you are now. Every single choice, no matter how small it may have seemed, has had a major impact on your entire life. The choices we make definitely change the path that we take.

Most likely, every friend you made changed your outlook something. Every place you went to will remain in your memories. Maybe you experienced something because of certain choices that led you to learn a valuable lesson.

Maybe those dreadful things of your past needed to happen to allow you to grow. No one deserves to hurt, but sometimes hurting then healing can be replenishing.

I think we should value our lives because they are so unique. No one on this earth will have had the same experiences you have. Even if someone was following you around 27/4 or was literally joined at the hip with you, they would not have the same life as you, because their thoughts would be different from yours and their perspective would be different as well.

You will never get the same day twice, so it is important to make every day the best you can make it. Try to laugh in stressful situations. Try to breathe when there seems to be no air left for you. It is vital to keep moving forward. If you look back, you'll trip on everything in front of you. Do not look into your past and examine your mistakes negatively. We grow from mistakes. We live and we learn. Use those mistakes as a study guide to become a better you. Use your past to your advantage and try to give yourself a better future.

It is important to know that life is a roller-coaster with twist and turns, peaks, and sudden drops that will make you feel sick to your stomach and scared for what's waiting at the bottom. But if you fear life, you will never enjoy the fun parts.

Look back and examine yourself but don't write a novel about your mistakes. Move past them and live a better life. Spread love, be kind, and be grateful for what you have overcome. Those hurdles you went through have only made you stronger.

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