Note: I’ve never watched Stranger Things, and the following are assumptions exclusively based on what has popped up on social media. I also have not done any research about the show other than looking up the character names to match to the pictures. I don’t remotely know the plot or the nature of the Stranger Things.

Jonathan Byers

Quiet and reserved. Tries to work on his own but somehow ends up mixed in with the other teenagers and ends up helping/getting help from them. Probably doesn’t like the douche-y guy.

Mike Wheeler

This kid has a bike 60% of the time. He seems like the one who says he doesn’t like the Stranger Thing but is probably going to investigate the Stranger Thing. Is there a villain in this show? I’m not entirely sure what the antagonist is here. I assume the Stranger Things are happening throughout and that they are bad.

Lucas Sinclair

I’m 90% sure this kid is just done. He was just looking for a fun time and got pulled into this ish by his friends. He isn’t going to leave them though. Looks pretty smart and has a backpack. He’s usually smiling. These kids are all usually smiling, when do the bad things happen? What are the Stranger Things?

Dustin Henderson

This one is definitely my fave. He’s best friends with bicycle boy. One of them has several best friends, I don’t know but I don’t think it’s central to the story. He wears the hat, and I hope nothing bad ever happens to him. His smile is literally the cutest thing on this show. He may be comedic relief, but I’m not sure. Again, they all always look like they’re having fun.

Nancy Wheeler

She seems like the girl who is going to complain about everything always and not acknowledge the Strange Things that are happening unless it’s right in front of her face. Didn’t know her name until I looked up the pics, but if she’s related to Mike Wheeler she’s probably overprotective and yet somehow also ineffective at keeping him from doing anything.

Steve Harrington

He’s a huge douche. I don’t know what he messes up, but I’m sure it’s something. I think I’ve seen him with Nancy. Mike probably doesn’t like him. I know that something happens to Barb, and I want to blame it on him, but it’s probably just because he seems like a terrible human being. At some point maybe he’ll do something redeemable that reminds us of his humanity, but until then he’ll just be obnoxious.

Eleven

So I don’t know if this girl has superpowers or can talk to the dead, but she is definitely one of the Stranger Things going on in the show. Also, she really likes waffles. Like REALLY likes waffles. I can’t blame her. She looks scary but I think inside she just needs friendship and love. Some Strange Thing definitely happened to her at some point.

Will Byers

I literally have no idea who this kid is. I only saw his name/picture when I looked up the cast list. I assume he’s related to shy-guy Jonathan.

Barb Holland

Barb is the friend none of us deserve. Something bad happened to her and we are all sad and miss her. I am not sure if she is dead or just disappeared (Strange Thing, perhaps?). She seems wise and I doubt anything would have gotten done without her.

Spooky Lights

Okay, I’m no expert on contacting Strange Things in the beyond(?), but I’m pretty certain that these Christmas lights next to the letters were used to communicate. Despite never having seen Stranger Things, it has brought me one of my favorite things on the internet currently.

To those of you who have actually watched the show, how did I do?