We are constantly being sent message about what we should be doing in our lives to live a good life or to be a good person.

From the time we can walk we given instructions for all the things in life we should do; listen to our parents, eat our fruits and vegetables, wear modest clothing, and always say please and thank you.

If you live life only doing what you feel you should do instead of what you want to do it can lead you to devalue yourself, your opinions, and your needs. It may have come to the point where shoulding on yourself is so natural you don't even know you're doing it.

Here are a few things that you may not have realized you are shoulding on yourself.

1. You should do that favor.

While its great to offer a helping hand to a friend in need sometimes that leads to us overbooking ourselves or prioritizing other people’s needs before our own. In the long run, if you’re always saying yes to people because you should they will eventually start to abuse your kindness and may cause you to resent that person. So don’t feel like you should always say yes to your friends but only do when you have the time to.

2. You should go to the gym.

We all have those days where we just aren’t in the mood to workout. Do you listen to your body on those days and let yourself rest though or do you go to the gym because you should after all the splurging you allowed yourself to do yesterday, you should be getting ready for swimsuit season, or you should because it’s what all the health professional are always bombarding us with.

3. You should dress up today.

They always say you should dress to impress. When we are judged so much by what we wear and how we look there is a lot of pressure to always look your best even on those days where all you want to do is throw on your favorite sweats. Instead of feeling like you should dress up so others don’t think you’re a slob dress the way that you want to so that you feel comfortable and ready to take on your day.

4. You should go to college.

As a recent high school graduate, I still have memories of sitting through school assemblies where we were basically told that if we did not go to college we weren’t going to be successful in life. For some people school just isn’t an option. Some people can’t afford the climbing cost of furthering their education and for others, school was just never their thing. Those people should not have to sit and listen to people basically telling them that they are going to live a poor life due to not being a college graduate. There are plenty of trade job opportunities and other ways of gaining skills to make a life living and have a successful life.

5. You should go out tonight.

As an introvert, there are some days where I feel like just being by myself. I always seem to be dragging myself out of the house on those nights those to go hang with my friends because I feel like I should because if I don’t they will never invite me to another thing or that saying no is rude. While some nights I’m glad I dragged myself out there are other nights where I just have no fun and yearn to be back in my bed.

6. You should go with the popular opinion.

The majority rules, popular opinion, social norms; to be cool just go with the crowd and if you don’t agree just keep it to yourself because you don’t want to be considered weird.

7. You should eat the salad.

We are constantly being told what foods we should eat and what foods we should avoid like the plague. Stop listening to everything the diet blogs are telling you and listen to your body you’d be amazed at how well your body knows what it needs nutritionally if you’d listen to it.

8. You should put others first.

No one wants to seem selfish or rude and that means that you can’t look like a taker or self-absorbed. But always putting others first can soon lead you to believe that you are lesser than them and that their needs should always come before yours.

9. You should always appear happy.

NEWS FLASH life is hard sometimes and pretending like you don’t have a problem isn’t going to fix it. It’s okay to show when you are struggling or unhappy it’s not a sign of weakness or that you are trying to bring people down. The reality of life is that it’s not always going to be fine and dandy and no one should have to feel like they can’t express when they are unhappy.

10. You should be at this point in life.

You should be at this point in your education or career, you should have a certain number of friends, you should have done this with your life, you should be married, have kids, and a home.

Stop comparing your life to others or to what society is telling you your life should look like at your age and embrace your life for all it is.